Today, I went into my room and found a plastic snake on the floor. I yelled out to my sister, "Good one, Ellen!" I picked up the snake to take it to show her. The snake started moving in my hands and bit me. I had to go to the hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
It wasn't me!
Today, I visited my grandma. Shortly after I arrived, she freaked out after finding a "snake" in her closet. It was a rubber snake that my brother must have put there yesterday as a prank. I picked it up and told her it was fake. She then yelled at me for playing such a disgusting prank on her. FML
Lurker
Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML
Today, it was my first day being home after doing a 4 and a half month hike through the Appalachian Trail. This evening, I stepped out my front door and directly onto a copperhead snake. It thought my leg was tasty, and I went to the ER for the first time in over 20+ years. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML
Today, I was running outside. On the last mile, I was alongside some fields. While running down the side of the road, I glanced down and saw a snake. I was so startled I jumped left in front of a car, screaming like a girl. The snake was dead. FML
Psssssych!
Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML
Today, I was spending some time alone out in the countryside, when I glanced at my boot. I saw a snake, screamed, ran like hell for my car, tripped over my own feet, and smashed my kneecaps. Upon further inspection, I realized the "snake" was my loose shoelace. FML
Catch
Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML
Australia? Australia.
Today, I had to chase off the Eastern Brown snake that's been hanging around. When it doubled back, I fell over trying to move out of its way and landed in a bush that contained 3 separate wasp nests. My body feels like it is on fire and the snake is now in my chook shed, refusing to leave. FML
Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
Top comments
Peroxide 3
I was camping and out late riding my bike when something got caught in my spokes and was going round and round. It was dark and I thought it was a stick so I reached down to pull it out and it hissed at me. Needless to say I dismounted faster than the speed of light thus proving Einstein wrong. Shove that in your pipe and smoke it!! E=mcgetthefuckoutofmybikesnake
Kingdutch 3
That'd scare the ---- out of me O.o FYL
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Comments (94)
Eylandt 0
I call BS! Firstly, You do infact see Snakes all over Australia including Sydney! Secondly, If you went to Hospital you would have been told what species of Snake bit you. You clearly leave this out. Thirdly, If the Snake bit you simply from handling it the Snake would have attempted to hide as soon as you entered the room. Failing that as soon as you started yelling out it would have ran. Furthermore as you went to pick it up it would have tried to move away. Please.. If you are going to make up stories try and make them sound realistic. Kind Regards Australian Reptile Keeper/Handler
Mylife_is_so_fd 0
i call bs on you if you wre an "austrailian reptile keeper/handler" as you put it you would know that snakes dont run they slither dumbass
Kopa_fml 2
'ran' doesn't always means used legs to move, a lot of people use it simply to indicate speed, or fleeing from something. Don't call bull just for a wording issue.
Firesushi200 3
fake or not i wudve screamed my ass off
Mylife_is_so_fd 0
Last
marine10_fml 0
your not telling the truth
victoria4161993 0
it bit you and you still called it a plastic snake haha
niknik2014 1
OMG!!!!!i would have freaked out
sammiwilhelm1127 0
your braver then me fake or not I would never touch a snake
Lilly710 2
Who's Ellen?
Dilwann 27
The sister. READ. Goddammit, people like you make me think every American is dumb as ****.
Isoldael 27
Time for glasses?
lsd_25 8
oh shit thats scary