Today, I went into hospital and was being treated by a really cute doctor. Not knowing that I was going to end up here, I put on novelty underwear this morning. Well, at least he found the little green glow-in-the-dark skulls amusing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
Today, I awoke after 4 hours of surgery. The male nurse taking care of me is cute, very cute. I'm trying my best to seem fine and dandy when he tells me that I can't eat anything before my next poop, adding, "And don't flush it, OK? I need to check." FML
Today, I spent the night in hospital. As soon as I was alone, I writhed and twisted in all directions in my attempts to pee in a bottle left precisely for that purpose. It was at that moment that the doctor, a good-looking guy, came in. My legs were spread wide and I was right in the middle of doing my business. FML
Today, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelled out "Relax" and "Enjoy". FML
Today, after my shift at the hospital ended, I happened to look into a full-length mirror. My new scrubs turned out to be see-through. Instead of my undies, everyone got a good look at my cellulite-ridden ass. Fan-fucking-tastic day to wear a thong. FML
Today, while working an early shift, I was dressing a wound on a gorgeous guy, when he laughed and pointed out some granny panties next to me on the floor. I guess I forgot to take yesterday's underwear out of my pants before putting them back on this morning. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Today, I asked a guy to change into a gown for an X-ray exam. I asked him to leave his underwear on, everything else off. Apparently he was going commando, as he left skid marks on my table when the exam was over. FML
Today, when I was visiting my dad in the ICU, the nurse was trying to help him sit upright and his dick and balls plopped out of his hospital gown for everyone to see. FML
Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML
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Top comments
MyPupRox 2
Better than glow in the dark unicorns.
Muwahaha_fml 4
It could be worse-granny panties.
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Comments (131)
lovemeorhate11 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
"K, put the hospital gown on now. " "What? Uhh no thank you"
chiddy_bang71 0
Good one.
chiddy_bang71 0
Good one.
DKParth13 5
^fail
StoryOfTheYear 15
What is 1 trying to accomplish?
Vball6 19
21- number 11 sounded like he was being sarcastic.
kaylalove1234 0
your dumb
LouisianaBob 9
my dumb what?
StoryOfTheYear 15
^^^ Actually original. XD
graham11 14
11- well that was quite stupid.
humorizer 14
What I'm wondering is why a male doctor is needing to look at a girl's vaginal area. I mean... she would have known if it was a gynecology appointment (it's not something a parent would randomly force upon you out of nowhere). I can understand the chest (listening to the heart), but yeah... underwear usually implies panties.
andrewboygenius 4
OP states that they didn't know they were going to end up at the hospital, which implies maybe an accident occurred where a doctor (just so happens he is a male) had to look down in that area.
fromthesuck 8
I've heard a story about a girl who was sitting on a counter doing herself with a broom. Her parents come home and she panics and jumps, skewering herself in the process. Bet that girl didn't know what underwear to wear that day either
chocomilkshake 5
Do you live in Arizona...? Or maybe that story just got around...I never heard of the person or anything but that story always made me feel sad for the people involved... ._.
MyPupRox 2
Better than glow in the dark unicorns.
Babushka_Homyak 10
I personally think glow in the dark unicorns would be badass. Just my opinion though.
MrSassypants 34
Or glow in the dark unicorns showing their skulls. That would be amazing! **** YEAH! YES! YES! YES! Over did it huh? No? Okay then. YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!
jwade11 12
Doctors shouldn't comment on that shit! It's called being professional for a reason!
amanda_say_whutt 9
37- Why not ? I like it when my doctors are funny and I guess you could say "unprofessional" to a certain point. I am terrified of doctors so to me it shows me that they're human too.
TheWindowLicker 13
Also, it never said he commented on them, 37. Just that the doctor thought they were amusing, which could be anything from commenting on them to just giving a small chuckle. Either way, it's really not that big a deal in my opinion.
nalia18 8
You know what would be bad ass??? Glow in the dark gangster snomen... Yhats right Ho ho ho!!! Bitch you know im coming to town Dick n balls are what you suck on falalalala **** off you red nosed bastard
cosmosis 12
61- get off the drugs darl... Clearly they are doing your brain no good
djmigues 7
NOTHING is better than glow-in-the-dark unicorns.
ohmylanta22 5
If I were a doctor and some person I was treating was wearing glow in the dark underwear no matter what the shape, I would at least chuckle.
TypicalTroll 0
Did he diagnose the glowing skulls too?
That0therguy 4
No.
DKParth13 5
What a typical troll!!
TigerSpots 4
I thought that was funny :D
bubblekitty 1
Derpina: Forever alone!!!
graham11 14
4- are you describing yourself??
allard 14
Troll face.
roflrawrlol 0
problem?
bubblekitty 1
Oh my bad. Didn't realize I was talking about your mom ...
Muwahaha_fml 4
It could be worse-granny panties.
ayooBrandon 12
It could be worse no panties
MerrikBarbarian 9
My thoughts exactly! Better cute undies then grannie panties!
thisisafunnyname 12
or stained panties
WTSchool 0
It could be worse. Nothing at all?
ArcticPuppet 0
Or lace undies with skid marks.
lustheart 7
Could be worse.... No underwear. Diaper. Boom.
Mister_Triangle 21
There's a saying: always wear clean underwear because you never know when you'll get lucky or end up on a hospital. Now, novelty underwear isn't as bad as dirty underwear, but it sounds like OP is equally embarrassed.
Buttsexpirate 9
I'd find it kinda amusing to. maybe that's how you can start a conversation! It's quite a starting point haha.
MyPupRox 2
Too* (:
lolman222 0
Grammar Nazi!
TypicalTroll 0
I love your name
ananonymousguy 0
Illiterate Jew!
G97Alex 21
Glow in the dark? Not bad.
angrymexican 8
I'm kind of jealous
Zoranius 6
I find that really adorable!
ifuckmonsters 5
Hey, you can invite him under the covers to take a peek;)
ifuckmonsters 5
Hey, you can invite him under the covers to take a peek;)
kocoman500 2
ifuckmonsterstoo
KMtheDrummer 6
DoublepostDoublepost