Today, I was watching TV. During a very long commercial break, I found my brothers PSP charger next to me. Out of boredom I put my tongue on the end on the metal. Not only did it fry my tongue but found its way to my metal filling in my tooth. I now have a sore tongue and a throbbing toothache. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my little brother put a battery to my tongue while I was sleeping with my mouth open. The shock found its way right to my metal filling. FML
Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML
Today, while I was drunk, my brother decided to use pliers to pull out my bad tooth. He grabbed the wrong tooth, and when it didn’t pop out cleanly he decided he just needed to squeeze harder, and crushed the healthy tooth into splinters. I can feel the nerve with my tongue, it’s agony. FML
Today, I burned my tongue. With a flat iron. FML
Today, I popped something straight out of the oven into my mouth. It burned my tongue instantly, but instead of spitting it out, I swallowed. I felt it burning all the way down. Now I can’t eat solid food or drink hot drinks. FML
Today, I swallowed the piercing that I had bought for my tongue yesterday. FML
Today, I learned that, since getting my tongue ring, it has become imprudent to test 9-volt batteries with my tongue. FML
Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML
Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML
Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML
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Top comments
SamIsSoaked 0
idiot.
helennaa 0
YDI-That's completely ridiculous. I'm sorry. Have you been to a dentist?
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Comments (173)
abyss92nl 2
Thats awesome, I'm gonna have to try that!
Peroxide 3
You think that was fun, try using that kitchen fork i left you. Just ram it into the power point and you'll be able to see into the future.
VanillaChild 0
I lol'd.
serenesavage 0
Ha ha, So did I. But seriously, wtf were you thinking? Did you miss the lecture they gave you when you were what... 2 about putting things in your mouth?
gtdoll 0
lmfaoxD yah, I litteraly laughed out loud. ! srsly OP? I also heard that sticking a knife in the toaster gets you to narnia.
Luckster 0
And the Darwin Award of 2009 goes to......Shocked! Congratz on being a total dumbass! We're so proud of you! 8D
violinist666 0
For it to be a Darwin award, he/she would have had to have killed them self, therefore removing them selves from the gene pool. Hence the "Darwin award" for so gracefully doing humanity a favor and purging stupidity, ignorance, and other undesirable traits. (all in comical fun of course) However... this one I will say has great potential for a future Darwin... no doubt.
jamie_leeann23 0
Why would you do that? Even if you were bored, your not a child, you know that's dangerous... YDI big time.
CallMeHush 1
Please run some voltage thru your nuts next time, the gene pool is shallow enough.
tikimuppet 11
I didn't know anyone was that stupid... but then, you are from Texas...
MagneticGuitar 0
Darwin missed.
nokillnobeepbeep 0
Were you hoping it would shock your brain out of malfunction? And was it shockingly delicious?
tttron 0
You are a ******* moron
wazdog 4
Idiot. You only get superpowers if you lick the positive end of a AA battery.
jisaac09 25
????? Licking the positive end of a AA batter wont do you any good either... but its nice to know that even retards try to make retards feel retarded...... but don't worry bout it, I'm sure that you wont have any offspring either....
pepper477 6
its also nice to kniw that also retards call people retards while SARCASTICALLY making fun of a retard...