Today, I was walking to find a public toilet in a Chinese village. While looking for the women's restroom, I stepped on a thin sheet of plastic. I fell into the toilet's waste collection area and found myself knee-deep in the villagers' faeces. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML
Today, I went on a walk with my family because I'm trying to be more active. We were near my son's school when I got a grumbling in my stomach. I rushed to find a place to take a dump. As I approached a Porta-Potty, my ass couldn't hold it any longer and I shit myself 20 feet away from the toilet. FML
Today, I was on the toilet at work. After a very loud and very smelly session, I waited until the other stall had been vacated to keep my anonymity. As I leant forward for some toilet roll, my ID fell out of my pocket and into the next stall. When I came out, it was face up near the sink. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I had to flush someone else's shit in the public washroom at work. It was so vile, I didn't want to get anywhere near it, so flushed it with my foot, only for it to slip off the handle and into the toilet. FML
Today, I was in a public bathroom, when a little boy walked in and he had an 'accident'. He asked if I could help him clean it up, so I decided to help. I started to walk to him to assist him. That's when I walked straight into the pee and slipped. My whole back was covered in pee. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML
Today, I had to stop on a long trip to use the restroom at a gas station. Apparently, there was water damage beneath the toilet, because after about two minutes of doing my business, it collapsed about seven inches beneath the floor. Guess who got covered in water, black mold, and poo. FML
Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML
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Top comments
boydeee01 7
You shouldn't call someone a retard when you use the wrong "you're".
Scheisse11 0
That reminds me of "Slumdog Millionaire." I am so, so sorry for you! :(
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Comments (144)
hellFighter 0
fake
UGADawg08 1
Wow, we need to nuke that disgusting country.
haileykake 0
shit that IS horrible!! that is definitely a FML
wickedsick 0
& THAT is how you get pink eye, my friends. :)
Phallus_fml 0
That's not the worst that can happen to you in a Chinese village, my dear.
sissi_fml 0
huahauhau~~~im wondering which village you made this horrible shit~~~sorry for you~~
bihai03 0
haha been ther n I have almost done that. There arnt any lights in the villages, it was night time, raining, and walking on a path the width of ma shoe, i made it but almost fell it haha, almost that stuff smells nasty, soo bad, i still dont rly kno y they have a stick in ther to mix it up. I'm not sure.
bihai03 0
#67, ther arnt any showers there, you use a bucket n pour ice cold water all over yourself. Not evrywheres lyk da states.
asttro_boy 0
gross
Georgek44 0
Yes this totally reminds me slumdog millionaire, a sure-fire way to get past most security guards.