Today, I was walking down the street when I heard a loud splashing noise to my right. I looked over only to see a woman not squatting but bending over, spreading her cheeks, peeing a horse-sized amount of pee. I can't un-see this. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, I was working in my store. Right around closing, a lady came in to try some things on. I went to the back and when I came out, she was standing in the middle of the room with fluid coming from between her legs. I asked her if she was going into labor. She wasn't. She was peeing. FML
Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truck stop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud that I wet myself. FML
Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML
Today, I was walking past a group of old men exiting a building. All of a sudden, I heard a strange splashing sound, and discovered one of the completely inebriated men walking behind me, pissing on my boots. I sped up, but so did he, and he didn't miss once until he was done. FML
Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML
Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML
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Top comments
purplehaze980 0
I think she could have been fined for this .... ewewwwwwwww .
jdub28 0
when you have to pee... you have to pee. why did you stare long enough to notice it was a horse sized pee?
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Comments (236)
IfuckedMYlifebad 0
it would have been even worse if she had a blue waffle. lol
956TXking 0
blue waffle FTW
FreeRunn3r 12
stop complaining bitch.
FreeRunn3r 12
oh shit ,served!!!:]
Peacemaker9 7
omg!!!!!! ur scarred for the rest of ur life and u just passed it on to millions on plp on fml ,,ur contagious!!!!! no it's too much!!!! lol jking but really u just scarred me for life...... do I here quarintine plp coming?
blankettt 0
@fualignment Oops, that did sound pretty stupid. I meant that I didn't know we could pee while bending over, without making a huge mess on our legs and feet.
fualignment 0
haha all good. I was kidding anyway :)
sathetic 0
xD ^^ ftw!
solecism 0
I wonder if there is a market for 'homeless people peeing in public' calendars..? Any takers?
Quest_ 13
YDI for stealing the punchline from the ******** hobo FML.
Diannaa 0
That's exactly what I was thinking. I'm surprised no one said anything sooner!
popatia 0
28 Wins. :D
spazzman 0
hahahahahahahagrossomg
CallMeHush 1
Now if we could just get 2 eggs Danny Thomas style. google it people.
osnapp55 0
but i don wanna!