Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML
Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML
Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML
Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, on my rush to get home from work to use the bathroom, I hit a deer. It startled me so badly that I wet myself. FML
Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
Today, I woke up desperately needing to pee. I sat up in bed, naked, and tried to decide if I should get dressed, or run for it and hope no one saw me. I guess I took too long to decide, because as soon as I stood up to run, I pissed on the floor. FML
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Top comments
Tequilamockngbrd 7
I'm not sure what's more stupid: wanting to pee on a grasshopper, or expecting it to wait in one spot while you peed on it. Silly.
Luckster 0
That Grasshopper waited all day to do that to you! You know that, right?
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Comments (127)
Tequilamockngbrd 7
I'm not sure what's more stupid: wanting to pee on a grasshopper, or expecting it to wait in one spot while you peed on it. Silly.
DameGreyWulf 1
I think I must agree, but 1 has a point.... [edit] wtf, I replied to a comment down below about "If I was a guy, I'd do the same" Well, 1, you have a point.
omghehehe 0
Really! :D I replied to #1 and it's missing. Also, his/her response changed too :D Anyway, I agree with #1 :) Yes, silly.
your_mother 0
Karma's a bitch.
Edumacated 0
I take it you're not a guy =).
mwz777 0
haha ya but I wouldve done the same thing
dont_stop_believ 0
if you didn't want ur pee on u y wud the grasshopper want ur pee?! haha loserr
Rejectofsociety9 0
...and you didn't see this coming, OP?
xJC77x 0
I woulda done the same thing lol
bom_bom 0
omg...LOL...i added it to my favs...i almost peed myself after i read that.. kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk(second comment)
Captain_Obvious2_fml 6
if youre gonna pee, you better find a nice urimal with a grasshopper in it...
ilovemenn 0
AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!
swimdiva 0
isn't**
SykoOne 0
LMFAOOO !!! OMG YO , if i was a guy , i would TOTTALLLY do the exact SAME thing ! :)
Basiil 0
Why can't girls do that? :/
KyRidHEART 0
Cuz we have this think called a ******.
MicMic_fml 7
116 - is that thing edible?
Luckster 0
That Grasshopper waited all day to do that to you! You know that, right?
LeeIsAwesome 0
YDI for peeing on it.
iheartjustinsane 0
Exactly.
dabeachbum 0
if i was a guy id do the same thing hahaha
lenasaur 0
Thats what you get. How would you like it if someone peed on you?
mutantcow 0
you clever, clever person. (:
Captain_Obvious2_fml 6
kinky...
Honda288 2
Ask Steve Stifler.
CheapoBilo 0
Ydi for not ******** on It instead.
juicy_extasy 25
LOL OMG! Weigh it down?! You're so evil!
cactusbutt 0
oh, lol! x)
CrazyV 22
hahaha good one
DeadMansCrack 4
LOL I would say YDI, but it sounds like something I would do.