Today, I was waiting at a traffic light next to an ice cream van. The man in it turned to me and winked, making sexual hand gestures. I felt my childhood die horribly as I watched. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, I was ringing an elderly gentleman up at work. As I went to package up the buns he ordered, he held up a hand and told me to wait. He then looked me in the eyes, started squeezing them, then winked and told me to go ahead. I've never felt so violated. FML
Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML
Today, after leaving a store I got stuck at a red light. A car pulled up next to me and there was a half retarded man jerking his junk at me. Nasty image burned into my corneas forever. FML
Today, I waved money at a passing ice cream truck and it kept going. So apparently I can't even get a date with a Sno Cone. FML
Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML
Today, at my job as a cashier, a very old man came through my checkout. His purchase consisted of a box of condoms and a can of whipped cream. The creepy smile he gave me has scarred me for life. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, after a horrible day at school, I went through the McDonald's drive thru for an ice cream cone. Everything went well until I had to pull a sharp turn. The ice cream is now no longer on the cone, but instead all over my hands, face, steering wheel, and the carpet. FML
Today, an old man walked up to me, said, "Hey missy, you wanna see an antique?" and winked. FML
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Top comments
iAmPaul 49
That's extremely creepy.
joe3_fml 15
Better not make eye contact with him when you lick your ice cream.
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Comments (76)
LightningSFX 9
Last time I order ice cream from a truck...
awkotaco333 15
Wow mine just died too
alex_epico 7
Very creepy!
SnowKitten 14
I like how it's under 'Love' haha
LifeBitesYourAss 2
Aww, how sweet. He just proved stereotypes about the ice cream man are based on some truth.
lollypop624 11
He should NOT be selling ice cream to children!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LRSandTJB412 8
Report him, he'll be fired.
KittyHawkMarch 29
My childhood died as I was reading that.
hoosiergirl94 31
I think it should be implied that all ice cream truck drivers are pedos
sarah2453 17
Why look? Flip him off and watch the road? You don't have to watch!