Today, I was told I've secured the job I applied for at my local hospital. Being just 19, this is a great opportunity, and I told my parents. They angrily asked if I'd applied just to get access to drugs, then demanded to know how I'd managed to pass the drug test. Thanks for the confidence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML
Today, I found out I was passed over for the promotion I've wanted for 9 months at the fast food restaurant I work in. Who got the job? The 16 year old girl I trained 2 weeks ago. Their excuse was, "She has ambition." I'm going to college for food service management. She failed her drug test. FML
Today, I'm a proud non drug user, but I trusted an oat cookie at my brother's birthday, which was loaded with pot. Tomorrow is our mandatory drug screening at work, my job is government based, and I worked my ass off to get it. Anyone who tests positive or misses the test is sacked immediately. FML
Today, I found out why I receive random drug tests at work. The safety department was specifically told by my boss to check up on me because I always seem way too cheerful to not be high. I've passed every single test. FML
Today, while answering an "anonymous" survey about how to keep my school drug free, I told them they should stop drug testing the kids that they know don't do drugs and test the sketchier ones. They in turn drug tested me. FML
Today, I had to resign from my job because I tested positive for drugs. I've never taken drugs. FML
Today, I interviewed for a job at a pharmaceutical lab. During the interview, I said something about a past work experience that made the interviewers think that I would enjoy doing something similar to that… so they gave me a warehouse job instead. I have a degree in chemistry and biology. FML
Today, after five months of unemployment and hardcore job searching, I got hired for my dream job. I called my mum to tell her all about it, to which she responded, "Great honey! Now all you need to do is lose all that weight." She allowed me all of four minutes of feeling good about myself. FML
Today, I was offered a job that pays far more than I expected, being a high school senior. My parents decided they aren't letting me take the job, saying I should enjoy my childhood. They're also not paying for my college, which is why I was looking for work in the first place. FML
Today, the company I applied for called up congratulating me in getting the job. I was ecstatic. Quickly enough I texted a few mates that I'd got the job. Twenty minutes later they called again, saying the trainee had accidentally called the wrong applicant. FML
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Top comments
ihpp 22
Congrats on the new job.
Quinn32 16
They need advice so they can pass their drug tests at work.
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Comments (43)
ihpp 22
Congrats on the new job.
AKGirlinSD 20
What 1 said, OP's parents should have said. Be proud of yourself, OP, and prove your parents are wrong!
ladyLALAA 29
Congratulations OP! Now... Can I get access to the drugs through you?
Quinn32 16
They need advice so they can pass their drug tests at work.
joshiepo0 18
Synthetic urine is the best option.
Smashhoof 15
Don't eat poppy seed bagels!
imyy 20
Sounds like they may be a bit guilty, suspecting you so strongly without reason! Swipe their pee (somehow), use it for your test (when they test you at home), and when you fail - tell them you used theirs :-)
jkmartinjk 16
Meh didn't need their congrats anyway... Good luck at the new job OP!
MrBurnard 7
Do people never look from the parent's perspective.. Why did they ask that, is she a known or recovering addict? Parents, okay not all, but generally wouldn't be arseholes for no reason
skulltorn 8
After seeing the word "arsehole", I'm going to assume you are not American. Let me tell you something about the United States, parents here are complete assholes!!!! Most have good intentions but are still asshole.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
There are arsehole parents everywhere, not just in the US. And why does saying arsehole mean they're not from the US...?
dorworters 9
because most people here dont talk like that...
gg27787 6
Because the majority of people from the U.S. say ass instead of arse. And he's not altogether wrong about the parents either.
boofgall 16
Sounds like some very unsupportive parents. Forget their opinion, congratulations OP!
t_Wag13 7
Did you pass it?
VannahJane 17
Obviously otherwise OP wouldn't have gotten the job
moonsalt 20
They're just jealous you're so successful at such a young age. ;)
ironichalibut 24
But you can get the drugs? Don't hold out on me man.
tacojauns 45
I can just imagine OP saying " because there wasn't one"
BadApple88 29
Congrats and just prove them wrong
SuperdudeGuy 8
Just don't become a pharmacist and they won't be too upset.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
Yeah, OP, don't be selfish! Give up your job and ruin your future for the sake of your idiot parents!
dorworters 9
youre aware that a pharmacist and a doctor...are not the same thing...right? you seem to be under the impression that what you said is the sarcastic version of the comment to which you replied.
bpeavy07 5
OP didn't say they were going to be a doctor. I work in a hospital pharmacy as a pharmacy technician.