Today, I was talking to a friend about this stranger I kissed a few nights ago while drinking. I commented that I was ashamed of doing so, and to make matters worse, the guy was really unattractive. It turns out he was no stranger. I'd kissed my friend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I found out that the last time he saw me I was blind drunk and vomiting after having propositioned him all evening. FML
Today, I ran into an attractive friend of a friend who I hadn't seen since a night out last month. I tried my best to be friendly and interesting, but he still seemed awkward. Later I find out that last time he saw me, I was blind drunk and vomiting after propositioning him all evening. FML
Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML
Today, I woke up beside a disgusting guy I didn't know. He told me he was the best friend of the handsome guy I was hitting on yesterday evening. I can't remember at which point I got mislead into bringing the wrong one home. FML
Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML
Today, I had my first kiss at a party. Later, I was told that the guy had been dared to kiss the ugliest girl in the room. FML
Today, a drunk dude walked up to me and said, "You're ugly as fuck." His sober friend quickly apologized and explained that he was wasted, before looking me up and down and adding, "Well, not completely, I guess." FML
Today, I learned why a guy at work hates me when he drunkenly confessed it at a work retreat. Apparently I look like a gay teenager he had a horrible awkward one-night stand with, and every time he sees me he gets mad at himself. I could have gone my whole life without knowing that. FML
Today, I received a text from the guy I'm into, thanking me for helping him drunkenly stumble back to his apartment last night. He ended it with, "How long did you stay?" Apparently, he doesn't remember confessing his secret love for me, or the fantastic kiss that followed. FML
Today, I went in for a hug with my friend, but she leaned in for a kiss on the cheek at the same time. What followed was a full-on awkward face collision where I ended up kissing her on the lips. We both stood there, staring at each other before I muttered, “Sorry, gross." She really took it personally. FML
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Top comments
Lizzi_fml 10
Aren't you classy?
justsayfuck 5
This doesn't make sense at all. So you were talking about how you were so ashamed you kissed a stranger a few night ago and you were so drunk and blahblah and this friend didn't interrupt you? Didn't tell you it was actually him? Furthermore you cannot forget you kissed your friend, but remember he was ugly but still not recognizable as your friend. I don't get it, were you both still/again ******* drunk while having this conversation? It's the only way it makes sense.
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Comments (103)
luciaaaaaaaaaaaa 5
first
rlerke 0
kurli, i
dreamering 16
He looked unattractive even after you were drunk? He really must be something to consider for horror movies.
rlerke 0
kurli, i think you need legonut to explain it to you.
BenD0VER 0
@14: It's funny because you kissed your friend and told him he was unattractive. I bet that kiss was nice and moist.
legonut4 0
it's funny because you made out with your friend I bet that kiss was nice and moist
Brittney_E 0
sounds like you had a good time(:
SiLeNt_MiNd 0
Yea no we understood the post lol no need for a recap
spaceboyftw 0
ydi for having unattractve friends
FunnyWeasel 7
hahaha, this has been a drunken moment, after all, alcohol makes jackasses out of everyone!
pohkerfayce 0
lol
FunnyWeasel 7
nah, we don't have thumbs so we can't pick up a beer
__ShAd0w__ 0
2 camels in a tiny car
chili10 18
63, you have a thumb in your picture.
FunnyWeasel 7
i'm talking about real weasels, not cartoon weasels
AyeItsMobleyy 0
83, RWJ much? lmao
rlerke 0
so what, Stfu.
cockymofo 10
I'm pretty sure no matter how drunk I get, I still recognize my friends. what a ****** idiot... and a *****
harryluvsginny 0
you look like robert pattinson
BrownSugar_fml 5
Oooh burn! haha. He actually doesn't, Robert is pale and disgusting. Hhmmmm now I'll wait for the twat-hards to comment.
twinny_sc 13
73, I'm a twilight fan and I find Robert Pattison to be extremely disgusting.
My2864 1
why is she a *****? i mean when i guy makes out with a chick its okay but the girl he makes out with is a *****? **** off seriously
BrownSugar_fml 5
#77 kudos =] bet you read the books before you saw the movies
louiseth 9
I hate Twilight, but Robert Pattinson isn't so bad. He's pretty in 'Remember Me'. And he's just generally a funny guy.
speckledots 29
I read twilight before the movies were even out and I hated them then. The crappy actors just made it soooo much worse. And yes R.Patts. is disgusting. The ONLY positive thing about the movies is Taylor Lautner's body. Yum.
Lizzi_fml 10
Aren't you classy?
nerdsgetmehot 23
Yikes. My thoughts exactly! OP must have been pretty wasted to not remember that it was her friend she kissed and not a stranger.
awesomeness1004 3
agreed
Raleigh_bruh 7
Eh, she was probably a lightweight. :P
nerdsgetmehot 23
I'm a lightweight too, but I've never been in OP's situation before! :P (No, really. 3 shots and I'm done for.)
Raleigh_bruh 7
I guess you're right. Op just must be one of those drunks that do randomly weird things like this. Still, three shots? Come onnnn. :p
nerdsgetmehot 23
#25 Yup, some drunks are just prone to doing strange things! :P 3 shots doesn't get me wasted or anything (I hate the feeling of being that far gone), but it does get me drunk! I hardly ever drink, so that's probably why... #28 Hmm, I guess that's true! Right on.
KiddNYC1O 22
everyone hates the far-gone feeling. it's the buzzed feeling that wins
BECK_OR 0
I can do better than 3shots, 1 can of bulmers bt in my defence I hadn't ate sence the dinner the day before, and I was only an hour outa the bed.
T1A2Z3 35
Yeah... a pint gets me pretty wobbly crying about stupid things etc... that's why I don't drink
KiddNYC1O 22
mercy, what the faaackk are you talking about?
KiddNYC1O 22
lol =
KiddNYC1O 22
lol waah
CRUZs_GURL1 0
awsomeness1 you're cat looks like he could be the avatars cat he has a cute arrow on his head
Son_of_Helghan 0
61- Bullshit and it's a ******* flying lemur oh some shit like that
CRUZs_GURL1 0
I know lol I know what it is sorry you didn't get it I said it could be not that it is and all the animals in the show are two animals together lol so you fail on understanding what I was trying to say
CRUZs_GURL1 0
I love that show!!! plus "momo" doesn't have an arrow they found him and named him after a peach only apa is his original avatar pet. gosh!!
weavermycutecat 0
ouch.
leney 0
aww:/
Incubuss 0
YDI for getting so wasted.
dudenextdoor 0
let's all get wasted!
MyChemical_fml 0
Omg Incubus is ftw.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for kissing random strangers. YDI for kissing anyone. YDI for drinking anything, ESPECIALLY water. Does your foot taste good? As long as you have it in your mouth, savor it a bit.
Geiko_fml 0
Lmfao. I'm glad I don't drink myself. Don't know how it affects me, but I'd hope I wouldn't do that.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
You can't drink yourself. Are you a glass of water?!
Geiko_fml 0
Yes I am dammit! I am half full!
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Optimist says "half full". Pessimist says "half empty". Engineer says "the glass is twice as big as necessary".
Geiko_fml 0
Or we can fill it for $20. Like building an amp that goes to 12 for $2000.
Raleigh_bruh 7
This wouldn't happen to be the same friend you were telling this to, would it?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Think so. Hence the FML.
locklock2 0
godam girl. awesome hair, beautiful eyes, bad ass look, u got it all :]
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Thanks. :]
jkea06 0
That's what you get for kissing stranger. that's just sick and wrong.