Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML
Today, I almost got arrested. The cops put me in handcuffs without searching me first and told me that I "matched" the description of a package thief. Turns out, I didn't even closely fit the description of the suspect. FML
Today, at an MA meeting, I ran into the cop who'd pulled me over and given me a ticket for marijuana possession. FML
Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML
Today, someone left their drug bag on the table in the lounge at my place, probably a friend, and probably a mistake. The next minute the cops knock on the door and force their way in. Immediately the cop spots the drug bag and cuffs me. It wasn't even my bag. FML
Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML
Today, I got pulled over heading home from college. My car was full of my stuff from moving out, and I couldn't reach the glove box. I told the cop this, and asked if he wanted me to go around to the passenger side to get my paperwork. He agreed. When I got out of the car, he pepper sprayed me. FML
Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML
Today, a man pulled a knife on me just so he could mug me of the cigarette I was smoking. FML
Today, my friend got pulled over. The cops searched the car and found a bong among the stuff we were moving to her new house. When they confronted her with it, she told them it must be mine, and that she'd never seen it before. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
Shouldn't of had it in the first place... You got lucky kid.
DocBastard 40
blazeheartsmythe - If you truly believe that marijuana is harmless, all that tells me is that the pot has already rotted your brain. Instead of blindly railing at people who DARE to insult your precious weed, try doing some ACTUAL ******* MEDICAL RESEARCH. Oh wait, I have to assume that you're too brain dead to do that yourself. Well fortunately I've done it for you. Marijuana has been shown to cause chronic bronchitis, increases the risk of anxiety and depression, and it suppresses the immune system, making you more prone to infections. It also is linked to membranous glomerulonephritis, coronary vasospasm, emphysema, and spontaneous pneumothorax. This is not anectodal evidence, idiot. These are respected medical journals which I read and you DON'T. I promise you, don't **** with me when it comes to actual medical information, because I guarantee you WILL LOSE.
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Comments (530)
liv2laugh721 0
Thats not an FML U got lucky
bettyboop1288 0
It happens, be glad cops are pot heads too...some of them anyway.
Jewnicorn36 2
Why did you even let them search you? They're not legally allowed to search you unless they have probable cause for thinking you had it.
gman90210 18
Yep you sure did. Lol
GawdamitNappa 4
A comma is very important for this post. Dry-walling your friend? Sounds dirty.
Epiqness 0
The ******* pigs.
oneleggedbeauty 0
Umm considering weeds illegal I will take it the cops giving you a warning. Take it as a sign. Cut the shit
mndlz 6
Dude you probably REEKED of pot which IS probable cause for all you bean bag lawyers out there. And the "pig" did the little pot head a favor for not slapping his stupid behind with any one of a dozen violations. So long as where ever you live has still outlawed the usage, sale, and possession of pot it is illegal. Don't like it join the campaign to have it legalized. Know why its still illegal in the US ? B/c most laze US potheads won't get off their parents couches much beyond lighting another joint, and raiding the fridge.
kayla_ann0o 9
277- I think you don't know what you're talking about. Sorry for the inconvenience.
greenmen 12
Well last time I was in that situation I ate it and got so high for a whole day. Dont try it. You were lucky not to go to jail.
CarlosAllenYoung 0
******* funny!