Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML
Today, I almost got arrested. The cops put me in handcuffs without searching me first and told me that I "matched" the description of a package thief. Turns out, I didn't even closely fit the description of the suspect. FML
Today, at an MA meeting, I ran into the cop who'd pulled me over and given me a ticket for marijuana possession. FML
Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML
Today, someone left their drug bag on the table in the lounge at my place, probably a friend, and probably a mistake. The next minute the cops knock on the door and force their way in. Immediately the cop spots the drug bag and cuffs me. It wasn't even my bag. FML
Today, I was stopped by a cop while walking down the street. He was slowly trailing me before pulling along side of me and asking how my night was going. He then said, "You know I can't let you do this. Know those new jeans you bought? The sticker is still on the leg" and drove off. FML
Today, I got pulled over heading home from college. My car was full of my stuff from moving out, and I couldn't reach the glove box. I told the cop this, and asked if he wanted me to go around to the passenger side to get my paperwork. He agreed. When I got out of the car, he pepper sprayed me. FML
Today, I was leaving a clothing store when the security guard stopped me and demanded that I surrender the clothing I was "trying to steal" by hiding it under my shirt. It turns out, he was just looking at my pot belly. FML
Today, a man pulled a knife on me just so he could mug me of the cigarette I was smoking. FML
Today, my friend got pulled over. The cops searched the car and found a bong among the stuff we were moving to her new house. When they confronted her with it, she told them it must be mine, and that she'd never seen it before. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
Shouldn't of had it in the first place... You got lucky kid.
DocBastard 40
blazeheartsmythe - If you truly believe that marijuana is harmless, all that tells me is that the pot has already rotted your brain. Instead of blindly railing at people who DARE to insult your precious weed, try doing some ACTUAL ******* MEDICAL RESEARCH. Oh wait, I have to assume that you're too brain dead to do that yourself. Well fortunately I've done it for you. Marijuana has been shown to cause chronic bronchitis, increases the risk of anxiety and depression, and it suppresses the immune system, making you more prone to infections. It also is linked to membranous glomerulonephritis, coronary vasospasm, emphysema, and spontaneous pneumothorax. This is not anectodal evidence, idiot. These are respected medical journals which I read and you DON'T. I promise you, don't **** with me when it comes to actual medical information, because I guarantee you WILL LOSE.
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Comments (530)
l0v3p4in 7
OP, thank you for making my day. :) This was priceless. I hope it becomes a part of a future Mastercard commercial. Speeding Ticket: $187 Bail Bond: $2,000 Attorney's Fees: $5000 Having Your Stash of Marijuana Confiscated by a Cop Without Being Arrested: Priceless
PuffPuffPass69 7
I like how the ignorant ***** on this site down vote every comment that shows scientific evidence in regards to the health benefits of cannabis as well as its harmlessness. I'd like to think at this day in age that people would finally open their eyes and rise above all the mindless bullshit lies that have been crammed down their throats over the years, especially since kids are taught the benefits of medical marijuana in school. But hey, i'm sure none of you close minded morons will even consider the idea that your wrong. Bury me.
StzaCrack666 18
People are a real bummer.
aaronmina 0
Yep you did get legally mugged. That happens every 8 seconds.
Urbanchiller 0
How is this a FML, if a cop just confesticate my weed without ticket or jail or bail, it is a perfect FTW.
xgetxbentx 13
Or you got lucky as **** and didn't get arrested? I wouldn't worry about whether or not the cop just wanted your weed. Bail for possession is $1,000 minimum where I live, so with the money you saved not going to jail, I'm sure you'll be able to buy plenty more. Then again, if you got caught, you probably aren't a very responsible user and should just take this as a warning sign. Don't ruin pot for the people who can use it responsibly.
midnight165 5
Ever seen that first season of weeds? If you didn't have to get a finger print or anything.. Then the cop just jacked you.. I wouldn't snitch on him cuz then you both will be screwed.. Just use this as a warning and get a medical card
theghost1309 11
Doc you're an idiot, and my point in case is when you said when you're impaired you don't know you're impaired. That has got to be one of the dumbest things I've ever read. I mean seriously? So when I'm drunk I don't know I'm drunk? You're a fucktard who has no facts to back up his opinion. What medical journals are you talking about that have you're so called facts?
Torrey_Turner 12
You should have asked to split the weed, I'm sure that cop was a resonable man, cause after all you did pay for it
radiocaf 29
I'd rather be "legally mugged" instead of given a criminal record.
mrpipp 0
Haha why all The hatin on pot?