Today, I was sparring with a guy in my Tae Kwon Do class. He had a hard-on the entire time we were sparring. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was helping a 7 year-old student in my martial arts class with his kicks. My reward? A surprisingly powerful kick to the testicles. FML
Today, at karate, my sparring partner thought it was completely okay to surprise kick me in the vagina. When he saw me doubled over in pain, he was completely surprised. Apparently, he thought that it wouldn't hurt, because I have no penis. FML
Today, at martial arts practice, a guest sensei wanted to teach me some "manners". He pinned me down and proceded to choke me while crushing my nuts with his hands and yelling at me in front of the whole class, "DOES THAT HURT?!!?" FML
Low blow
Today, we sparred for Tae Kwon Do. I forgot my cup, but I didn't think anyone sucked enough to hit me below the belt. Five seconds into a match, some girl knees me in the Hacky Sacks. After writhing in pain for 30 seconds, I got back up to spar. I didn't think she sucked enough to do it again. She did. FML
Take that
Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML
MMA FML
Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
Senpai Noticed
Today, my period started. It wouldn't be a big deal if it hadn't happened while I was in my karate class practicing kicks, and if the guy I have a crush on hadn't informed me of it after chuckling. FML
Today, while arm wrestling with my boyfriend, I had to pretend he beat me. FML
Today, I witnessed my karate instructor whimper and practically piss himself as a guy walked up to him in the street and demanded his wallet. What a total waste of hundreds of dollars' worth of lessons. FML
Top comments
Maxine17 8
Should have sparred him in the dick!
flyinmysoup 0
might have been more of an fml for him. i bet he was embarrassed
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Comments (228)
DBkkk 0
Maybe he umm likes you?
Dimmak_fml 1
Guys will get boners from anything and from experience, those pants tend to rub a lot down there. FHL.
iKaite 0
Is this guy Chuck Norris? If he is, then you should be proud OP.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
It's obvious it was not Chuck Norris. If it had been Chuck Norris with an erection, there would be NO survivors.
jkurtz87 0
guys will get boners out of the ordinary from my expierence it sucks like In the middle of class
aardvarkish 17
one of those tails from the ouija board, I take it...
thenormalguy 0
it could be because he likes you but guys get random boners from being nervous or just at random, I hate it :|
DizzyLizzy202 0
@85 and 90 WTF is it with Chuck Norris? He is NO WHERE as sexy or muscular and Vin Diesel or Bruce Lee.
ryguy997 0
is this from the real snickerdoodles? I thought commentators never created... or maybe a wannabe?
thatonek1d 0
congratulations!
DuckOnAStick 0
Ps3 is 4 newbs
ronton 4
the chuck Norris jokes are making fun of chuck Norris. it's sarcasm
zombiekiller52 24
With in a 50 mile radius
Maxine17 8
Should have sparred him in the dick!
Tigg3r 3
It's illegal to do that in Tae Kwon Do. We are fair fighters and we fight honestly. AKA No dirty tricks allowed. No punches to the face, neck, or back area. No kicks to the back, neck, or face. Only kicks are allowed to touch the back of the head. No hard or aggresive sparring. That's just my Tae Kwon Do class rules when it comes to it. Her's/his may be different but I highly doubt it unless the OP is doing mixed martial arts.
Maxine17 8
Damn.
Jaksan 0
In my TKD club and when you got into the advanced you got to kick at the head and knockdown people, hell I even saw a guy doing a jumpkick in the back of the head to annother guy
ERAUPike 1
@36 Since when is punching in the face a dirty trick. You are just making Tae Kwon Do sound more gay with every post. In Muay Thai we like to call it Take My Do. I have always enjoyed providing a solid beating to all the TKD retards that brag about the belts they bought. I think you have been mis-spelling Tae Kwon do though, I believe the proper spelling is J-O-K-E.
LOLYLIF 0
You probably should have stopped after your first sentence. No one really gives a flying **** about the opinions of you or your friends, and I'm willing to bet that in a fight against a "TKD retard", you'd get your ass whooped.
ERAUPike 1
Your response was almost as gay as Take My Do
PeopleRSoDumb 0
TKD is retarded. If you practice that, I hope it'll prepare you for the 300 pound dude who won't just stand there and let you fancy kick at him and hope it works. TKD is not applicable in real life at all, and thus just useless knowledge. Anyone with ANY sort of knowledge in anything else would just know to tackle them to the ground. Oohh what, can't do any kicks from the ground? How sad. Go practice MMA.
turdburgers 0
how is any of this relevant?
ERAUPike 1
@57, When you hit puberty then your opinion may matter.
Margui_fml 1
Are you dumb? Just asking.
sengmengida 0
every jiu-jitsu fighter who tries to take a tae kwon do student to the ground has to pass through their range first. it's like fighting a guy with a sledgehammer. those high kicks are easy to dodge, but you better remember to dodge instead of standing there laughing. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDn3p7pJdig this is the 2004 heavyweight tae kwon do olympic finals. tae kwon do fighters should have more practice than anyone else at avoiding high spinning kicks, right? this is a 200 pound man kicking an even larger, taller man in the head and winning the fight. with head protection on. how many times does the average jiu jitsu fighter have to deal with that kind of attack? unless you do MMA, you won't be doing any sparring in which head kicks AND grappling techniques are allowed, so probably zero.
roobear 2
Mr. Overzealous and eager to show your knowledge of Tae Kwon Do, it was a facetious comment... of course nobody is going to actually do that.
PayneTrain585 0
PWNED by #56
Tigg3r 3
Okay, this is a guy in a tournament TKD sparring. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWUWhp7vOR0 Prove to me that we kick softly.
saucyjade 0
i'm gonna go out on a limb and assume that i'm the only girl in this thread...GUYS, PUT YOUR DICKS AWAY AND CALM THE **** DOWN. all martial arts have different rules/styles/uses. if your school teaches you to disrespect other styles then you're missing the whole mental aspect of martial arts. plus tkd is the only style i've encountered that makes heavy use of common sense. you're 5'2 and a 6 foot, 300 lb guy tries to rob you? remember those warm-up laps we run in class? RUN THE **** AWAY.
daddysgirl1993 0
lol true that. I'm a girl and if theres a guy much bigger than you and your scared, your not going to remember all you learned. You also don't know what he might know,best just to run away and only fight if you can't run.
TKDmartialartist 0
Wow, okay that was completely ignorant. Tae kwon do is not about mindless fighting, its about respect, discipline, and self-defense. And to anyone who think tae kwon do is lame or weak or whatever, try taking a back kick from an experienced black belt, not a little kid, not a white or yellow belt, and you come back and try to say that tae kwon do is weak. I'm a girl, and I'm taking my black belt testing in a couple of months. And no one that I know "buys" their belts. We earn them. Tae kwon do is a more respectable sport than almost any other, besides proper martial arts. And its more than that. Its a way of life. You can't say that about many things.
TKDmartialartist 0
I meant for that to be to 56 and 62.
frikkinhannah 0
this. I'm in Tae Kwon Do and I'm sure a black belt could kick eraupike's ass with like, one move.
NataxChan 2
From what I've heard about MMA(I'm not really interested in MMA, because though my sensei doesn't speak badly about it, he doesn't recommend it because it's kind of like , "Jack of all trades, master of none") They have bad ground technique, or something. Tae Kwon Do is pretty good, but clubs that like give Black belts to twelve-year-olds and lower, well Idk how good those specific clubs are. All Martial Arts are good in their own way, but it all depends on the club really. Like, our judo club supposedly works really hard. We thought the excercises we were doing were strong, until our sensei went out west and saw some of the clubs out Edmonton. And there's a jiu-jitsu club in our area, and they criticized our judo skills, saying we were doing throws wrong. Their club doesn't have a lot of respect against other fighters, and one almost broke the arm of a member in my club during a tournament. There was a tournament we had in Halifax, and one of our club members fought some random guy. The other guy won, and afterwards he started jumping around, yelling.
htownlove 0
i like basketball
iCard 5
You do learn to grapple in tkd too...
grapisy 8
62-your comment had me till you mentiones MMA... otherwise I'd have to agree.
Foxracingluver 0
congrats!!! lmfao fyl
happyhak 5
@1, congrats ur first, ur gift is in the post, when you get it, please kindly shove it up ur ass... @OP, that must suck, ur teacher has a thing for you, drop out of class now before he does anything wrong D:
shoieb9 14
Too Funny :D lmao WIN!!!
Naomi Lacelle 14
How do you know the guy was the teacher?
flyinmysoup 0
might have been more of an fml for him. i bet he was embarrassed
RR05 0
this is a fake. if you spar in taekwondo, you have to wear a cup. you can't see if someone has a boner if he is wearing a cup you idiot
monnanon 14
er no you dont always have to, in the class i was in you could do low contact sparring with no protective gear. I suppose you could wear one constantly if you wanted to tho.
ConradKay 13
I am a black belt in Tae Kwon Do, and have been sparring for over five years. I don't even own a cup.
azurablade 0
he's gay.
ijustlaugh 0
Cutee
Roseicat 16
Be flatterd. ;)
demonshredder7 0
tkd is for pussys
obesemaurice 0
how can he get a boner if he's a pussy? think about it :P
wazdog 4
Throbbing clit.
matticus27 14
um its probably just the cup that you saw
Ai_Luv_U 2
Looks like he was having a good time. ;)