Today, I was skating in the city when I slipped and fractured my arm. As I was lying in pain, a guy walked up to me, frisked my pocket and took my wallet. He then said, "It's nothing personal." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking down the street, when a little old lady bumped into me and fell over. I helped her up and she thanked me for being "such a nice young man". It was only an hour later as I was in line at the store that I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet. FML
Today, I was riding my bike to work in a hurry and hit a pothole. I flew off and hit the ground hard. I was badly shaken, but an old lady came over, checked me out and helped me to my feet. After she left the scene, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet while "helping" me. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I witnessed a homeless man fall off of his bike and land face first onto the pavement. Bleeding and shivering in the 40 degree weather, I gave him the coat off of my back. He got up like nothing happened and sprinted away with it. Oh yeah, my wallet was in the inside pocket. FML
Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML
Today, I helped a "blind" man across the street. He kindly said thank you and patted me on the back. Then, I went into a store and realized my wallet was missing. FML
Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, I wrecked my car and got rushed to the emergency room. While strapped to a gurney, a nurse reached in my back pocket, grabbed my wallet and pulled the velcro keeping my wallet shut. The entire room immediately started laughing as condoms and loose change went flying everywhere. FML
Today, I got mugged. I almost felt sorry for him: he got a $15 cell phone, a frozen debit card, a credit card with only $50 of credit left on it, and no cash. FML
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Top comments
dawood_k 27
What an asshole... What goes around comes around
buckysam 7
Sounds like it is personal to me. What a douche bag for taking advantage of you because you were hurt. Hopefully he'll learn soon that karma's a bitch and get what's coming to him.
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Comments (50)
dawood_k 27
What an asshole... What goes around comes around
garadan1 18
Yeah! Karma will get him sooner or later. Sorry OP!
dfair1987 16
11 What if it doesn't get him?
Enslaved 38
So by that logic then OP did something to deserve this too?
strike2867 13
#34 maybe in a few days the OP will get to rob somebody, or get married to the nurse at the hospital, you never know. Personally I think all this Karma is bull, but whatever floats your boat.
kingcaper817 14
Ooooh yikes that's just a bit personal
sayyestothedress 24
That's cold! Hope your arm feels better!
buckysam 7
Sounds like it is personal to me. What a douche bag for taking advantage of you because you were hurt. Hopefully he'll learn soon that karma's a bitch and get what's coming to him.
vreid 20
Get well soon OP!
Chiroptera_Man 10
This is the part where you put on your glasses and say, "This just got personal." And go after him with new super human abilities.
SystemofaBlink41 27
But what would he be? "Broken-Arm Man"?
MzZombicidal 36
He'd be bad to the broken bone, #15.
leaper66 12
Wow! Hope you get well soon! That really blows. It's too bad you had the misfortune of running into someone who was willing to do that to someone.
Journiexo 18
People have no feelings for one another! Terrible
junkman6 22
Well I guess that's one way to mug someone? Zero effort required and you still get all the money. Gotta say it's kinda creative.
Cryptical 13
Your comment was bad and you should feel bad.
WCARlover 35
That's like saying taking candy from a baby is creative -_-
junkman6 22
I have a warped mind. I'm imagining this guy walking around town looking for injured people and then stealing from them. It makes me chuckle a little bit, because I can see someone being ****** up enough to do that as a source of income.
Cryptical 13
You, sir, are ****** up.
junkman6 22
Well in my mind you can take it two ways. Be outraged by it and let it bother you, when you really can't do anything about it. Or laugh at how ****** up it is and carry on.
Cryptical 13
I'm starting to like the way you think. Your thoughts are so.. real..
Zebediabolical 45
Taking candy from a baby is easy. The hard part is keeping them quiet so they don't scream and alert the parents that you're doing it.
shay_serendipity 29
#32, seems like you've had quite a bit of experience in stealing candy from babies...
Mortoli 30
I love how the jack ass commenter is getting all the likes and the realistic nice guy getting all the downs. Is that alarming to anyone though?
Cryptical 13
Bad luck reached a higher level.
WCARlover 35
Yeah it definitely will not personal when he uses your personal credit cards and takes money out of your personal bank account. Sorry OP I hope you can cancel your stuff in time and that he gets caught :/