Today, I was rotated to the graveyard shift at my job. My only co-worker is a twenty-something Paris Hilton wannabe who won't shut up about her belief that she's the reincarnation of Whitney Houston. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my new roommate woke me up at noon to bitch about my "selfish sleeping habits" and how they ruin her ability to invite anyone over. I work the graveyard shift at the hospital. FML
Today, alone at my new company, the guy who works the front desk joined me for lunch. I was touched at first, but then he proceeded to have a conversation (against my will) with me about Whitney Houston, for over an hour. That's one lunch break I'll never get back. FML
Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML
Today, I found out that a guy who works overnights had secretly been videotaping me singing and dancing to my favorite songs while I worked my own graveyard shift. My new nickname at work is 'Prancy'. FML
Today, my friend and I got into such a heated debate the police had to be called. The debate was about Whitney Houston. FML
Today, my lazy manager, who blatantly spreads vicious rumors about employees, one which has ruined a marriage, has started targeting me because her lazy daughter was legally fired. Now I'm known around the office as "the whore who slept her way up the corporate ladder." FML
Today, at a very important company function where lots of the big bosses were, including the CEO of the company, I absentmindedly introduced the executive director whose name is Whitney as “Whitney Houston.” On stage. In front of ALL of them. I’ll never live this down. FML
Today, my coworker told everyone on staff that I’m a stuck up bitch because I stared blankly at her when she tried to talk to me. I tried to listen, but I zoned out after she rambled on endlessly about the Kardashians and Kanye West. FML
Today, my coworker has once again called in and asked me to cover her shift. She does this for every single one of her shifts, and my boss told me that if I don’t cover it, I’ll be fired. I used to have a life, but not anymore. FML
Today, at work, I was making an appointment for an old lady who told me, "You look like a movie star!" I started to thank her when she followed up with, "Like that girl from the horror movie! Your black hair and pale skin makes you look scary! Oh, sorry…" with the coworker I hate the most sitting right next to me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DocBastard 40
So she was the reincarnation of Whiney Houston before Whitney died? How exactly does that work? Oooh! Maybe when this idiot was born she stole some of Whitney's soul and that's why Whitney spiraled into lunacy during her last few years. Ha! I've finally solved the mystery of "What the **** went wrong with Whitney Houston".
morganrules123 10
Whitney obviously put a horcrux in this poor girl.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (149)
thehurricanekid 6
Give her some crack. If what she claims is true, the rest takes care of itself
pittyfinny 4
Sounds like she needs a good banging. Whose there to tell on you? Ha
Briiyahh 7
I'm sorry good luck FYL no point in lying and trying to cheer you up because it mostly likely won't work lol
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
Wow, some many people are taking the whole reincarnation thing so seriously. I think it's a metaphor (is that the right one?) for the fact that she likes to sing, and she thinks she actually an.
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
*can
Santa_Claauz 0
Lol she believes she was the reincarnation before Whitney even died...
skokob 7
Then be Bobby Brown and smack her!
wubbazugg 5
Right, because Whitney Houston has totally been dead for over 20 years -.-
Anubis_81 21
Umm this makes no sense. Whitney was alive when this broad was born, so your post is invalid.
Sirin_fml 47
Or the co-worker is a complete idiot, and that was the whole point of the FML, you twit.
KiddNYC1O 22
Is 74 an idiot?
CoffeeChickBlows 13
Anubis all that partying's fried your 'lil brain get off FML and sit your dumb ass down in the doctor's office till it's your turn to get lobotomized. Edit: woah.
cherry72 13
Lol Sirin. This is me pushing the thumbs up to your response ;)
snowhitee 6
You should scare the crap out of her... It is graveyard shift and she is twenty something
greatfirstdate 18
Then....wouldn't she be a Whitney Houston wannabe? And I love how she believes she's the reincarnation of someone who didn't die twenty-something years ago.