Today, I was riding in a carpool when we passed a church that has a shady reputation. I said, "Man, all those people are being brainwashed, it's a cult". The lady sitting in the back seat behind me says, "I'm a member of that church…" OOPS. Silence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
One-uppers are so annoying
Today, I was in a support group talking about how my sister and I were raised in a cult. Never one to be outdone, the loud mouth of the group piped up and scoffed, “Oh please! If it didn’t make the news and no one died, then it wasn’t a cult!” Sorry I wasn’t murdered. It was still abusive as fuck. FML
Aaaaaaaaaaah!
Today, I went on a rollercoaster for the first time. I sat in the back, which was a bad idea. When it ended everyone in front of me turned around and stared. When I asked my friend what was going on, she said I had been screaming the Lord's Prayer the whole time. I hadn't even noticed. FML
Analog reverb
Today, I whispered to my friend during a quiet church service, “This sermon is so boring.” Turns out the whole congregation heard me perfectly, including the pastor. I guess the acoustics in these places was designed by snitches. FML
Bible belt
Today, after I recently started going back to church, my husband, who was last inside a church when he was replacing a boiler, told me I’d better knock it off because our kids threatened to stop visiting, and our neighbours think we’re “that couple.” FML
Evil always wins
Today, I was in the Walmart parking lot listening to some music in my car and some lady comes up to me and say, “Boy, the music you listen to is so unholy, I think you need some Jesus in your life.” FML
Today, my grandmother convinced me to come to a church meeting with her. My grandmother then made funny faces at me while the pastor was speaking, causing me to laugh out loud. Everyone heard me, including the pastor. FML
Witnessed
Today, during a family road trip, my mom decided to spring a surprise conversion on us. This included screaming bible verses, blasting crazy gospel music and sobbing that we needed to repent before we’re all condemned to hell for eternity. She did this for 4 hours straight. FML
Jesus, take the wheel
Today, during my religion class, my instructor decided to use the state of the class's cars as a metaphor for our relationship with God. When I told him my car had been totalled in an accident last week, he yelled at me for being an "agent of Satan." One class down, 59 to go. FML
Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML
Road trip to hell
Today, I impulsively cussed at a driver who was tailgating and honking at me. My mom, who is very religious and a school principal, was with me and it's extremely awkward between us now. Did I mention it's just the two of us on a week-long road trip? FML
Top comments
Miki101 18
Religion... It's a concept. It's a way of thinking. So what if it's wrong? No harm done, right? Wrong. Many wars have started through organized religion. Religion, however, isn't necessarily a bad thing. What if people just learned to accept each other's opinions? Perhaps the human race is too stubborn to learn that as a whole. I'm a Christian and I stand by my beliefs. No, I'm not a homophobe. So many Christians are though. But not just Christians are homophobes. Muslims and Jews can be. Buddhists can be. Athiests can be! It doesn't matter what god you believe in, or if you don't even believe in a God. We are all PEOPLE. I'm tired of the homophobic stereotype. I'm tired of the repression of religious or non-religious face day from day. Why argue about it? Why not just respect each other's opinions, put the past behind us, and move on. We are one people, united in many things, from our ability to think, to love, to create, to feel. Why does religion matter? Can you not look at your neighbor and see another human being, whether his religious beliefs are the same as yours or not? I don't care what anyone believes. I know what I do, and that's all that matters. I respect the beliefs of others and will not shove my beliefs down their throats. I believe that is what all of mankind needs to do. This world would be filled with a lot less death that way.
jim_witness 0
Ask her if she feels the same way.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (28)
Miki101 18
Religion... It's a concept. It's a way of thinking. So what if it's wrong? No harm done, right? Wrong. Many wars have started through organized religion. Religion, however, isn't necessarily a bad thing. What if people just learned to accept each other's opinions? Perhaps the human race is too stubborn to learn that as a whole. I'm a Christian and I stand by my beliefs. No, I'm not a homophobe. So many Christians are though. But not just Christians are homophobes. Muslims and Jews can be. Buddhists can be. Athiests can be! It doesn't matter what god you believe in, or if you don't even believe in a God. We are all PEOPLE. I'm tired of the homophobic stereotype. I'm tired of the repression of religious or non-religious face day from day. Why argue about it? Why not just respect each other's opinions, put the past behind us, and move on. We are one people, united in many things, from our ability to think, to love, to create, to feel. Why does religion matter? Can you not look at your neighbor and see another human being, whether his religious beliefs are the same as yours or not? I don't care what anyone believes. I know what I do, and that's all that matters. I respect the beliefs of others and will not shove my beliefs down their throats. I believe that is what all of mankind needs to do. This world would be filled with a lot less death that way.
TheFlamingTiger 9
You are a role model
8313girl 28
Yeah Miki, I wish more people thought like you. The world would be a better place.
coldasfire 23
Was this long comment necessary? I understand what you're saying but still..
twitchywaffles 26
I agree hundred percent. The only time religion (I am religious) is problem is when it's used as an excuse. I'd rather say they hate gays cause they too lazy to try the opposite sex again the. Have somebody tell me God told them to hate gays
Lunasis 14
and that's why you should not assume
melvinmoss 3
westboro?
Tallywa13 6
Wow way to make ignorant assumptions...do you believe everything you hear?
CoriCat 25
A morman church?
Gwen4var 31
Was it Gateway?
Paras_800 27
How to start a war on the Internet: Religion is made up... Let the fighting commence.
Sinshine 28
Starting a war on the internet is easy... Xbox is better than PlayStation. Android is better than iOS. McDonald's is better than Burger King. People shouldn't have guns.
randybryant799 21
Hopefully now you know never to bring up religion.