Today, I was on my way to my first job interview in months. I wasn't even halfway to the place when a bunch of cockbites in a car drove past and hurled a bucket of paint out the window, drenching me and several other people on the street. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I psyched myself up and headed out to a really promising job interview. I was sure I was going to nail it and get my first job. That is, until a bird shat on my head on my way there. Thank you so very much, universe. FML
Today, I went in my car to a very important job interview. I was out of gas, so I had to get some on the way. When i was done pumping, I went to get back in and the door handle broke off on the driver's side. Then I blew a tire on a piece of metal. Needless to say, I lost my chance. FML
Today, I had an important interview. On the way there, I stopped in front of a car window to look at my reflection, checking I didn't have salad stuck between my teeth. Having pulled several faces, I realised that there were two girls inside the car, cracking up with laughter. FML
Today, I was running late for a job interview so I took what I thought was a shortcut through an dank alleyway. I ended up getting chased by a pack of stray cats and arrived at the interview covered in scratches and cat hair. FML
Today, I turned up to my job interview ready for any question, with impeccable references and previous work experience. Then I saw that one of my interviewers was the lady I accidentally hit with my bicycle last week. She still has stitches in her cheek. No job for me. FML
Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML
Today, it was nice out, so I drove with my car windows down. I was stopped trying to turn onto a busy highway, when a car turned off the highway right next to me, hit a pothole, and splashed dirty water into my window and into my open mouth. FML
Today, I finally had an interview for my dream job. It was all going great until I started chuckling uncontrollably, snorted like a pig and hit the guy with the world's largest snot rocket. All I could do was slip out the door as he sat paralysed with shock. FML
Today, after several months desperately searching for a job and feeling pretty insecure and unimportant, I drove 15 miles to a job interview. On parking my car at the destination, I found that during my drive a spider had been making a cobweb between the car and my hair. FML
Today, I drooled on myself during a job interview and was immediately dismissed. This isn’t the first time it’s happened. FML
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Top comments
Qwermy 16
Those douchebags sure showed you their true colors, OP
dawood_k 27
Ain't nothing like painting the town red, and it's people too... (Was it at least red paint?)
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Comments (92)
dawood_k 27
Ain't nothing like painting the town red, and it's people too... (Was it at least red paint?)
AnOriginalName 19
Nope. It was black. Someone came through right before this group and got red on all the doors, so OP's group went through town to paint everything black.
badminton 14
Don't get mad at me for not knowing, but you're talking about the song right?
AnOriginalName 19
"I see a red door and I want it painted black. No colors anymore, I want them to turn black...."
brand125 17
i see white everywhere cause i bursted
liketenpandas 6
I wish I could thumb you up like a million times. ******* amazing song.
mannatee 19
Ahh, that one. Memory lane is a nice place, isn't it?
incoherentrmblr 22
Now you can go to your interview looking like Marv from Home Alone 2...
9echo 17
"I see the girls walk by, dressed in their paint-drenched clothes..."
Qwermy 16
Those douchebags sure showed you their true colors, OP
GreatGeak 8
oh i see what you did there. ;-)
badluckalex 23
those ******* cockbites
AurumPotestasEst 16
So... how did the interview go?
pratikp03 22
Better luck next time. You still did not lose the job yet..
WhatsYOURname6 25
I have a feeling he didn't get it......
Flowtastic 16
Can't lose what you haven't had...
DemosthenesMB 13
#23 - I don't think it would be worse in this situation. If you lose an interview, so what? You can try again! If you lose a job, it could go on your record and/or your boss could give any future employers bad feedback about you. OP, just be glad you're attempting to make progress in your life compared to those a**holes with nothing else to do but coat people in paint.
ohcheriecherie 20
I don't know which would be worse, coming into the interview and making a mess with paint, or rescheduling with an excuse like that.
kbecks87 16
43, I don't think losing an interview is a 'so what' situation. OP said it was their first in months and I know people sending out applications by the dozens and not getting interviews - not because they are bad applicants, but because companies are still not hiring at a rate that allows for 'so what' to be a response for missing the opportunity of a job interview.
ArmyDoc 11
"Hope you have a really nice pair of pants" Chris Gardner - The Pursuit of Happiness
chaoss10 18
I was thinking about the same thing. :)
MrsKilown 20
What scum! The karma cops are after them for sure! Good luck on your job search OP!
pussystank 18
And I thought immature assholes yelling "Godzilla" at a group of Asian people was the worst
WhatsYOURname6 25
Saw the word 'cockbites' and thought how is this person Irish?! And then saw the word '****' in the username and it all made sense! Sounds like something that would happen here alright. Good luck next time OP. Sorry that your opportunity was ruined by a bunch of pricks!
STOspartan 12
FML agreed. Plain and simple.
GoBigRed 6
FYL op, should have got their plate number
MrConcise 35
The first thing I do when I'm blindsided by a cascade of paint is memorize a sequence of numbers. I also immediately do neurosurgery after waking up and rocket science after a car crash.
chickenfeet223 11
And the winner for sarcasm
MrConcise 35
@40 - I can only imagine the lawsuits and horrified headlines if I weren't.
classiceagle63 16
Could find a new job in the blue man group.