Today, I was on a second date with a guy. Things got a little handsy and he pulled down his pants to reveal a micro-penis. He then smiled and asked me to be his girlfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I’ve known casually for a few weeks. Everything was OK, until he asked me to come back to his place because he had something “to share with me.” Apparently, he’s double jointed, because his mouth reaches below his waist. He even finished. FML
Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML
Today, after months of dating, I finally saw my boyfriend naked. Turns out he has a micropenis. I assured him that I like him for who he was and that we could explore other things. He said no, because oral and sex toys are "immoral." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for a second time. When I was getting dressed afterwards with him sitting next to me, there was a silence. To break it, he grabbed my hand and fistbumped me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a sweet guy who was 6”11 tall, a size 14 shoe, a 55 inch chest from all his gym muscles, hands like baseball gloves, and gorgeous green eyes… all attached to a 3 inch penis that I could barely feel, and that lasted barely 15 seconds. The foreplay was shit too. FML
Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML
Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML
Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML
Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML
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Top comments
baxeh 29
He shouldve asked before showing you his tiny penis. What a lovely unsatisfying relationship that couldve been
HyperTek 16
Two words. Second, date.
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Comments (76)
LAURA_EL_JUICE 6
Can he atleast work it?
RainbowSuperStar 5
I would have said no just for the level of creepiness...
MrGarrett26 11
and? if you like him before then that shouldn't matter.
species4872 20
Shrinkage Elaine, it shrinks when it's cold.
CBL88 25
"If you like him, it shouldn't matter" - well, if you can't feel your boyfriend inside you, it DOES matter. If you can't even feel that you're having sex, what's the point? And, unless you're not into sex at all, yes, it matters. Big time
Zelda9678 11
F your life because he was that forward. But you deserved it because the micro - size penis instantly ruined it for you, and YDI because you got handsy in the first place on only the second date.
Elban 20
Did he drive a big truck?
fishnutts 6
It's simple, size does matter.....an he has no game. Props to him for the upfront honesty.
DoomedGemini 38
Honestly I'm a bit put off by this FML. I read it as you were both getting hot and heavy and him having a "micropenis"(if you're not exaggerating) was the issue. If he just pulled it out suddenly, I definitely agree run away. But everyone sneering over dick size seems pathetic to me. Sex is important to many people, sure, but it's not an indicator he won't please you and it's horrible to make fun of and sneer over something they can't help.
KingDarsh 5
i just gotta ask is this any different than a guy not being with a woman because of weight,small breasts or anything based on outward appearance?
sparkledoge 29
Yes it is. If the guy really has a micro-penis chances are he can't use it at all, yes there are other ways to please a woman but the fact he just pulled his pants down is screaming "i fully rely on my penis". He might not be able to have children either, which can be a huge issue depending on OP's age and what type of relationship she's looking for. So yes, it's very different.