Today, I was on a second date with a guy. Things got a little handsy and he pulled down his pants to reveal a micro-penis. He then smiled and asked me to be his girlfriend. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a fifth date with a guy, and he asked me if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend. Just after I said yes, he pulled out a contract and asked me to sign on the dotted line. FML
Today, I had a date with a guy I’ve known casually for a few weeks. Everything was OK, until he asked me to come back to his place because he had something “to share with me.” Apparently, he’s double jointed, because his mouth reaches below his waist. He even finished. FML
Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML
Today, after months of dating, I finally saw my boyfriend naked. Turns out he has a micropenis. I assured him that I like him for who he was and that we could explore other things. He said no, because oral and sex toys are "immoral." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for a second time. When I was getting dressed afterwards with him sitting next to me, there was a silence. To break it, he grabbed my hand and fistbumped me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a sweet guy who was 6”11 tall, a size 14 shoe, a 55 inch chest from all his gym muscles, hands like baseball gloves, and gorgeous green eyes… all attached to a 3 inch penis that I could barely feel, and that lasted barely 15 seconds. The foreplay was shit too. FML
Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML
Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML
Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML
Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML
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Top comments
baxeh 29
He shouldve asked before showing you his tiny penis. What a lovely unsatisfying relationship that couldve been
HyperTek 16
Two words. Second, date.
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Comments (76)
hotpinkcrayola 5
Why is everyone assuming he just flashed his penis? She says in the FML things were getting handsy! Nothing wrong with going with the flow on a second date if that's what you both want. Shame about his size and bad timing, sounds like you liked him enough to be seeing it. But if it's a big issue (no pun intended!) for you then stepping away now is the right thing to do. F both your lives really - you for not getting what you wanted, and him for having a body issue people are gonna judge. Good luck back in the dating pool!
Triplegoddess11 13
Satisfaction matters for a healthy relationship and if he couldn't do it, oh well, at least you got a heads up!
NYGiants1925 22
The bigger issue should be that he whipped his dick out on the 2nd date & then asked you to be his gf.
DragonitePaladin 6
maybe he thought it was a perfect match for your micro ******? ;)
xMaeLA 24
Well, what did you say?
Avashantu 18
This went in so many directions & none of them was the right one.
queen_lol 24
I cant help but laugh lol . how did you react ?
RashaMae 2
Girls complain if you say they have tiny boobs and you prefer bigger ones but being with a guy with a small penis is an FML. Feminists Triggered.
jaydoo 6
Tell him to grow up.