Today, after telling me his other girlfriend is pregnant, my boyfriend said we should stay together so I could help out with the baby. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my boyfriend’s other girlfriend is pregnant. He doesn’t know that I know. A few days ago he told me that he couldn't have a baby with anyone. She has to be the right one, I guess I wasn’t. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
Today, I found out the girl my boyfriend was seeing just before me is pregnant. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I’m pregnant. He told me not to worry, he’d pay child support until it’s 18, and he’d be moved out of our flat by Friday. When I asked him why, he told me not to be stupid, no way was he being trapped into raising a kid. He didn’t even ask if it was a boy or girl. FML
Today, I am pregnant, and my boyfriend dumped me, saying that he didn't want to be stuck in anything too serious. FML
Today, my fiance told me he thought it was time that we started to see other people. I'm six months pregnant with his baby. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 months found out she was 4 months pregnant with her ex's baby. She told me I could leave her and she wouldn't blame me, but I decided to stay with her. She told me she loved me and then dumped me because she needed to be with her baby's daddy. FML
Today, my friend told me she wanted to get pregnant. I thought that was good news, but then she said she wanted my boyfriend to be the father of her baby. FML
Today, my ex dumped me for his ex who'd cheated on him. Today, I also found out I'm pregnant. When I told him he said, "I’m really happy for you. I hope it all works out." FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother found out that I'm three months pregnant. She told my boyfriend to put it up for adoption, and now wants a paternity test. FML
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Top comments
Vashen 5
kick him in the balls and tell him to get lost
Mirorbo 27
When exactly did his brain cease to function, darling?
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Comments (199)
CelloNerd 0
soml.
ShadowPunkChick 1
What does that even mean?
bravesfan112233 0
he forgot the f, give him a break
ell_oh_ell 0
you did say no rite?
FFML_314 12
I would say no to Rite. It's gross and I don't appreciate the company trying to impersonate the taste of Coca-Cola. /Nothing/ will take your place, Coke!
suppressed08 2
Pepsi destroys Coke on so many levels :)
RedPillSucks 33
Feh! Coke tasted better when it actually had cocaine in it.
FFML_314 12
Yes, RedPillSucks. What's happened to the world?
bishoprsv2 0
Okay. I've got some good options. 1. Cut off all of their arms and legs, dump them in a volcano, and then they get eaten by bulldogs. 2. REcapitation. 3. Slowly cut off all different parts of their body until they bleed to death. 4. Poison of some sort. but make it so they take it willingly. 5. Put them in a room with shrinking walls until eventually they get smashed. 6. Cut their stomachs open, and, using various different types of string, peel back the layers of skin, exposing internal organs, as far as it will go, then tie all the different string to a wall or something and chain them up, letting them hang their until they bleed to death and use them as puppets during/after. 7. Stick a tube up their nose and poke their brain until they die. In certain societies, you would eat their brain to gain their knowledge. Do it. 8. Try to perform open heart surgery. 9. Find an Iron Maiden. Lol wholeheartedly.
darkmis1 18
While OP's boyfriend and his pregnant girlfriend deserve it, the baby doesn't. So all of those torture methods are horrible ideas, becase they would kill the child. OP: I REALLY hope you broke up with him.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
76 that's just too much lol
ThePwnapple 0
YDI for not satisfying him with enough dinner, hurr durr.
glambert1998 0
why kill it when they can put it up for adoption?!
happykate120 0
76 should direct a slasher film. I would pay to see that.
rzbt21 0
that's when the semi auto comes in handy... pop pop!
harmoo_fml 0
your boyfriend is douche. sorry op D:
dmin67 0
now that's an open relationship
KiddNYC1O 22
lmao that's funny
Mclovin_95 0
ur a dumass xD
CelloNerd 0
the app cuts off my comments. I'm seriously not doing it on purpose.
iSitt 0
does that make you the evil stepmother ?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
117/CelloNerd: Using certain symbols on the app sometimes cuts mine off too.
hedgerow 0
oh yes!
stephanie0613 0
hahahahahahthis fml really made me laughh . i don't understand how some guys are such idiots.
SarahBearXoX 0
76 kind of scared me but... I agree on some levels
SarahBearXoX 0
I hope ops ex (I hope) boyfriend trips and scrapes his knee caps. op all you need is a steep flight of stairs.... (kidding)
lol_ironic_life 9
76 is someone I wouldn't ever want to mess with 0_o. OP take his advice! lol and dump that sorry excuse of a boyfriend. you deserve much better!
Swimmer248 0
76 is sexy
Killah_Jay 0
lol #76 sounds like they worked with the director of Saw.
Cheedweed 12
...
Poster_Pastry 0
pwnd
MissErikaHart 0
at least ur not the one stuck with his baby. consider urself lucky n find someone else! ps. I bet the baby the other girl is bout to have ain't even his
th3b0ss 0
sucks for u
glorialaura21 8
no it sucks for the other girl. "today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. His response? to call up his other girlfriend and see if she'll stay with him. fml." hey atleast OP can just leave no strings attatched!
MC_Telepathy 0
******.. fiftyeight!
Vashen 5
kick him in the balls and tell him to get lost
Vehicle 1
Yes, kick him very hard in the balls to ensure he won't be making any more offspring like himself.
Azure_Ebony 0
Your boyfriend really is a dumbass.
unfortunate_13 5
sounds like she's dating kelso
FFML_314 12
He's right. Help the man!
hd9280 0
Yeah.. help him! you love him right? unconditional LOVE..
noscope_ftw 0
hell yea he has some balls to say that dude, u should totally help out
niatimes 0
but he also said OTHER gurlfriend which means he was cheating on her ass now he " love" her and need her help **** him
rizzle88 0
screw him, his babys mum should just **** off and shouldnt of told him he is gonna be a dad, wish i did woulda saved my kid alot of grief. he got another chick knocked up she did what i wish i did..
apark15 5
If he's not ready then don't have a baby and don't ask help from the "other" girlfriend
d3adb3for3d3ath 0
Lousy boyfriend.
Mirorbo 27
When exactly did his brain cease to function, darling?
happykate120 0
i love you, whoever posted this LOL
Mirorbo 27
Why thank you!~
rttr 18
Lol
Fishfanatic 7
What..the...shit? NO.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
*Psst*... check your PMs.