Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a furniture store. We split up for a bit, and after a while I went to find him. A salesman noticed I seemed to be looking around for him and said, "Oh, your son is upstairs." We're the same age. FML
Today, I was at IKEA with my parents. I walked away from them and later I heard the speaker of the store call my name asking me to come to the playground because my mom and dad were worried. I'm 18. FML
Today, I was in the supermarket when I saw a little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I went over to him and asked if his mom knew where he was. The boy turned around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML
Today, I went to Ikea with my family. I was wearing a yellow polo that vaguely looked like the ones the Ikea employees were wearing. Two dozen people came up to me, complaining that I was staring at furniture instead of helping customers. FML
Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML
Today, I took my dad out shopping. I managed to pull into a really cramped parking spot and said, "Man, that was a tight squeeze." My dad then looked me in the eyes and said, "So was your mom." FML
Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML
Today, I got junk punched by a midget in Sears for giving him "a funny look." I was trying to read the price of the fridge he was standing in front of. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were furniture shopping. They had miniature versions built of some of the desks. He commented how they were "cute for little kids" to use. They were 6 inches tall. I had to explain to him that they were only models, not real desks. I'm dating Zoolander. FML
Today, I brought home a ukulele I had just bought. Excited, I showed my dad. He then looked at me, smirked, and said "Just like everything else you have, it's a bit smaller than normal." FML
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Top comments
Silhouette_fml 0
Hey, he was sitting in the couch, right? So he was just proving your point.
spankyness 0
How dare you say small things are for small people... ...and then he bought the couch
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Comments (140)
shalvius 3
hahahaa
Snerkie 0
#11, not all small things are for midgets, yeah? They're still people and deserve respect not douchebags saying stuff like this
fmlolol 0
@ 1: because midget is an offensive term?
ReyEr9412 0
^ FAIL
asswipewanks 0
the least you could do is called them dwarf.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
The term "dwarf" makes me think of Gimli and his brethren. I don't know, but it seems to me that "midget" is the least offensive terminology.
brocho 26
If I'm not wrong, there is actually a difference between dwarves and midgets.
WeStayCrunk24x7 0
not an fml but your midget realtions just took a big plummet
Chris968 0
Not you fault... you spoke the truth!
speakxtinaaaaaa 0
Did anyone ever teach you Political Correctness? Using that word is like using the N-word. Good job.
Rhythm_Man 0
midget by definition means "short person," and is in no way derogatory when applied to a short person. it's like calling me a Ginger, because my hair is, in fact, the color of Ginger.
SammyS2012 21
I personally dislike being too politically correct
brocho 26
Using the word "midget" is in no way at all similar to using the N word. As far as political correctness goes, most of it is taken way too far if you ask me.
woahcomments 0
what are the odds?
eschreib 0
that's a strange coincedence
eschreib 0
and are you serious #20? you're ridiculous. just stop