Today, I was in a hurry trying to get into my locker, but it stuck. After a few frustrating attempts, I finally managed to get it open. In anger, I threw the door open, but it bounced back and hit me in the head. My natural reflex was to jerk forward, giving myself a black eye from the hook inside. I got in a fight with my locker and lost. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Today, during a major argument with my girlfriend, I shoved a door open, which then rebounded and hit me in the face. I'm not sure which is more pathetic: that I was savaged by a door, or that I made up a story about kicking a mugger's ass to explain the huge black eye to my coworkers. FML
Today, I tried to open a door with a dramatic kick, like in the movies. The door didn’t budge, but my shoe flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today, whilst heading out the door to go to work, my lanyard got caught on the doorknob inside, and I watched my keys swing back inside as the door closed behind me. It was locked. FML
Today, I was terribly late for class, so I rushed to the classroom door, thinking it was unlocked. I smacked face-first into the glass, and awkwardly fell to the floor. Once I got back up, I peeked through the glass, only to realise it wasn't even my class. FML
Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it and hit me. As I recovered and was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML
Today, as I rushed to get my pants on, I slipped and bashed my forehead against the solid oak back board of my bed. School starts in 30 minutes and I look like I lost a boxing match horribly. FML
Today, I was in a store using the only bathroom there. After I was done, I realized I couldn't open the door. Panicked it locked me in, I banged on the door, and screamed for help. The security and a whole group of people gathered, only to find that I was pulling the door instead of pushing it. FML
Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML
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Top comments
b_anhero 0
look on the bright side: your natural reflex is to charge, head first, into danger.
random210 0
bahahaha. I always had that problem in high school.
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Comments (170)
hidingoutt7 0
7 that's werid I have no one under my locker the whole areas mine
FFML_314 12
The locker will always win. When will people learn this?
SaintE_fml 0
agreed, however don't give up the fight
Peacemaker9 7
lol that's sucks
imaginaryvoice 18
Guess who's not one of your favorite FMLers!
Peacemaker9 7
?
imaginaryvoice 18
Guess who doesn't remember me...
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
what about me :D (your all time favorite)
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
yes? no? maybe? so?
Peacemaker9 7
lol
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
you still haven't answeeeerrrrrred
FFML_314 12
Shut up, 59. Also, if you hate 'Brits' you are on the wrong site. This place is /full/ of them. Not to mention, created by them. They must not be annoying, seeing as you enjoy the site so much. You should just crawl in a hole. Please.
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
FFML you are one of them (I didn't mean Brits I meant annoying people) go away.
Peacemaker9 7
WTF isn't ur name Zack or am I wrong? Fml- yea I definitly don't remember u so goodbye-no offense intended
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
zach* and she's a **** just ignore her
illmatic2 16
How can you say you didn't mean Brits when you specefically said "I hate British people"? You're an idiot.
FFML_314 12
That made no sense. "You are one of them" No, I'm American. Big words, for such a little boy. Thank you, Zach. (Illmatic2)
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
no I said "your one of them (NOT BRITS, annoying people)
Peacemaker9 7
when the he'll did he say anything about britts? cuz I don't see athing like that on this thread
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
I even said I didn't mean Brits clearly on the comment. are you people blind?
Peacemaker9 7
ffml was that " that made no sense" comment for me? cuz I am lost in this whole britts thing? it went from me remember two plp to an arguement .
illmatic2 16
Peacemaker he said he hates British people on his profile. Zach, it didn't make sense at first, you're comment wasn't very clear.
FFML_314 12
Oh no. You're going to cry, aren't you? You're going to land yourself some classy women, throwing around the C word. ;] Happy hunting!
illmatic2 16
*your
Peacemaker9 7
oh....ok then why bring it up on this thread? u shouldve done it on ffmls comment above mine.
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
yes I'm verrrry sad I hope you find a guy (that's if, anyone likes you)
Peacemaker9 7
ffml who the heck u talking to!? I can't tell...I'm not mad or anything I'm just curious..
FFML_314 12
I'm talking to the 12 year old baby. He knows I hate him. Find a guy? Well I have a girlfriend, but thank you anyway.
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
so your a lesbian?
Peacemaker9 7
oh ok. well I'm all good now... thanks for clearing it up for me.
FFML_314 12
I'm a lesbian what? Finish your sentence!
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
your a lesbo
FFML_314 12
.....should I repeat my question?
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
YOURE. A. LESBIAN. correct?
FFML_314 12
Thank you and no.
xWTF_FML_FTWx 1
you're welcome. I'm going to go now.
ohthebloodygore 16
You're all idiots! :D
Xythenol 6
But Captain Hook the Locker NEEDED your eye so he wouldn't have to wear his eye patch anymore! D:
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for being outsmarted by an inanimate object, for having a locker, for attending school, and for having a head for it to hit!
shacoria 0
Learn to control your anger and things like this wouldn't happen
keilanclarke 0
shut up bich
Edokun 0
"some people can NOT controll their anger but yeah, for some people it is physically and psycologically impossibe for them to supress their anger because mabe they are bipolar or arent mntally strong enough and their are other reasons why but i really cba to name anymore, iv used enough smart words :3
Crysta_fml 3
I'm sorry... what 'smart words'? I didn't catch any.
metallicatime 0
I did the same thing except the hook part. haha that blows man
Juneyah1017 9
lmao did you get beat up by your backpack also.
FirstBornUnicorn 0
That locker made you it's bitch.
Frenchtony 17
what do OP stands for ?
nond2nv 4
Original poster
imaginaryvoice 18
Original Poster :)
FirstBornUnicorn 0
OP stands for Ogre Piss.
nond2nv 4
JINX.
Trollz4daLULZ 2
Orgasmic Penetration. I'd tell you to ask your mom to explain it further, but that last donkey punch has left her too woozy to speak.
Frenchtony 17
thank you I've been wondering for so long