Today, I was in a car accident, two days before Christmas. I'm now laying at home, not able to walk. My whole family thinks that I'm joking. A car drove over my foot, I'm not joking. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML
Today, my family and I were burning our Christmas tree. For a laugh, my dad jokingly pushed me toward the fire. I tripped, and my doctor says the burns are probably going to scar. FML
Today, I was joking around with my manager about faking an injury to collect Worker's Compensation. Then I actually slipped and sprained my foot, and now my manager thinks I'm lying. FML
Today, I didn't feel like going to work, so I called in sick. Five hours later while out shopping, I got hit by a car at a crosswalk. Now I'm laid-up in the local hospital, really wishing I was with the guys at work. FML
Today, I decided to take my girlfriend out to look at Christmas lights and get hot chocolate. While cleaning my snow-covered truck, I slipped and broke three bones in my ankle, and now need surgery. FML
Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML
Today, I fell over on the bus. X-Rays revealed not only that I have been growing extra bones in my foot, but that when I fell, I crushed all of them. Doctors don't know how to fix bones that aren't supposed to be there, so they're just going to cut them out. Two days before Christmas. FML
Today, after my at-the-time partner got in a car wreck with minimal injuries, I drove two hours and got a week off classes to take care of them on hand and foot, they are currently my platonic roommate and I nearly broke my foot… and they keep acting annoyed when I ask for something because I can't walk. FML
Today, my boyfriend knocked into me with his car. I drove myself to the hospital because he couldn't stop laughing long enough to drive. FML
Today, I called the campus police to give me a ride to the cafeteria since I am on crutches from knee surgery. I was only halfway into the car when the man started driving and ran over my foot. Now neither my right knee or my left foot work. FML
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Top comments
nominaski 25
why would anyone joke about getting in a car accident?
Pingvinai 37
Something something candy cane joke.
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Comments (64)
interesting33 37
Get an x-ray - get a doctor!
armattiuzzo 16
You first said that it was a car accident but a car accident is prominently known as cars colliding and serious injuries. What you said is a car accident but much more low scale. I think you should have rephrased what you said. It gives the wrong impression
chasebeck1921 12
Does your foot look like a candy cane?
False_Stupidity 42
I'm sorry if I come across as being an arsehole, but I can't help wondering if OP has a history of joking about such things and that this is why his family don't believe him this time.
minagiv 11
You definitely have it worse than I do! I only sprained my ankle on Saturday!
burritondoritos 4
You must be a wuss , the same happened to me as well as being knocked off my ass by the car
pandasx 11
One time my brother parked our 7 seater car.. On my foot.
dellh1295 4
Dude swear to god this literally happened to me on Sunday!!! I can't work for 3 weeks because I have to keep my left leg immobilized.
timmay801 10
That doesn't even ******* hurt that bad
dancerr45 7
I feel ya, I had hip surgery a week ago and can't walk on the leg they operated on.