Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. She's a sock puppet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Ah, young love…
Today, my parents thought it would be appropriate to tell my girlfriend that I used to stick my penis in a sock puppet and talk to it when I was younger. FML
Not so anal retentive then…
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, I tried talking to my wife about our sexless marriage. Her only response was to toss me a sock and say "Knock yourself out, fuckstick." FML
Nailed it
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me a blow-up doll and told me to practice. FML
Snoozefest
Today, during sex, my girlfriend got so bored that she asked me to tell her a story. FML
Bad sign
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
Actor's Studio
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Top comments
porcelainkisses 5
I laughed so hard when I read this. YDI.
coballan55 0
is she hot?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (308)
DeeBaby74 0
Wow dude i think u should jus go gay!!
cubie21 7
wow. that's really sad.
angryamericanx 0
never trust a sock puppet, my cousin got herpes from one!
JayDaJew 0
Finnaly another person. You see mom im not a conplete social outcast. :-p
buggybeauty 0
how'd this get approved? whoever moderated it should be killed.
LOLSWAT 0
dont u mean "a COCKpuppet?"
musicchick1712 0
^^^ haha win
loveanna928 2
omfg?!?! how does that work lmao . get a girlfriend , or when your feet are cold , wear your "gf"
phazon000 1
great success
thebigslim 13
The **** is wrong with you?!?!?!
duburich 0
hahaha wow so did you even take her out to dinner or a movie first? does she have a foot fetish? haha you are one cheap individual.. they make blow up dolls too Hahah (if you are that desperate) and don't worry just let your doll wear your current gf.. make it a threesome bahahaha