Today, I was feeling nauseous and my cat was comforting me. I breathed in through my nose, and my cat's fur caused me to sneeze. I sneezed so hard, I threw up out my nose. Nothing will get rid of the smell from within my nasal cavity. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sneezed while I was throwing up into the toilet. It turns out that throwing up is even less pleasant when the puke violently shoots out through your nose. FML
Today, I had a cold and was vomiting. I sneezed really hard, smacking my nose onto the toilet seat. I woke up a few minutes later with my nose bleeding, painful, and still stuffy. FML
Today, I've had a cold that just won't go away for the past few days. After staying painfully awake for most of the day, I eventually fell asleep in the afternoon. When I woke up, I found my hungry cat sitting on my chest. She then sneezed in my face and walked out of the room. FML
Today, I gave my cat a little kiss on the head. Just as I was about to tell him I love him, he sneezed directly into my face. It's been two hours and I still can't get the taste of cat snot out of my mouth. I probably need to get a life. FML
Today, my cat sneezed directly into my open eyeball. FML
Today, my cat kept sneezing all morning so I took her to the vet. $150 later and the vet says she's fine. I get home and the noise starts up again. My automatic air freshener spray sounds just like my cat sneezing. FML
Today, I tried to introduce myself to the stray cat outside my house. As it turns out, this cat is very friendly. He got up and started climbing on my shoulders like a parrot, sniffing me everywhere. Then I sneezed and he fell, scratching my back and neck very badly as he did so. FML
Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML
Today, after days of nasal congestion, I stifled a sneeze. It went out my nose, blowing out a massive spray of green gunk, streaked with blood. This happened at a meeting, splattering the table in front of me with green bloody mucus. The other attendees looked horrified and one ran to vomit. FML
Today, I suffered an uncontrollable sneezing attack. I have the runs. It wasn't exactly as bad as I'd have expected. Just a lot worse. FML
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Top comments
stronghand0331 17
The best line is, "My cat was comforting me." I wish my cat comforted me like that. Selfish little jerk!
RedPillSucks 33
Did you throw up on the cat?
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Comments (101)
lexxiii 17
ewww! that's worse than milk coming out if your nose, haha!
angeluv_2014 22
Uh, yes, I beleive stomach acid would be worse than milk. Good one, Captain Obvious. :
Shiamah 0
oh...that really sucks. try perhaps spraying some ferbreeze on some fabric and sit close to that, it might help with the smell.
LouieLZ 5
That's the real good question, isn't it?
dynky 3
It'll be gone by tomorrow. There's nothing you can really do about it.
ulicksam 0
The cat wasn't comforting you. The cat wanted you to comfort it. It's not a dog.
BCrazzi 9
Cats will comfort you if ur hurt or sick smart one..
choirnerd1808 0
try a nettie pot you can get them just about any store with a pharmacy. it cleans your sinus cavaties. make sure you breath through your mouth or you will suck the water into your lungs.
Jkwild 0
ydi for having a cat. =)
BigEV 0
What a disgusting scene.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Did that after drinking Pepsi once. I still can't drink Pepsi without feeling nauseated. =
jvdubz 3
coffee beans work