Today, I was feeling confident enough to approach a guy by asking the bartender if I could buy him a refill of whatever he was drinking. He was drinking water. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML
Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
Today, I went to a bar with my best friend, and some guys came up to us and started flirting with her and offering her a drink. I felt a bit left out and started joking that "I'm thirsty too". One guy looked at me, cringed and said, "No, I don't buy drinks for weird girls." FML
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to ask out the girl I like. After nervously fumbling through my words, I asked, "Want to grab a cup of water sometime?" She looked at me confused, then asked if I meant coffee. FML
Today, I went to a bar for some drinks. A guy looked me up and down, gave me a suggestive smile, then asked for my name and number. I'd have been a little less creeped out if he hadn't been standing beside me at the urinal the whole time. FML
Today, I’m so embarrassed I can barely believe it: I was out on a date and he asked the waitress to bring a pitcher of water and extra sugar packets. He took two Kool-Aid packets from his pocket and mixed it up right there at the table, proudly stating he didn’t need to pay for drinks now. FML
Today, I went to my favorite café to order my usual iced latte. The barista smiled and said, “The usual, right?” I nodded confidently, except she wasn’t talking to me. She handed the drink to the guy behind me and said, “Thanks, babe.” He winked at her. I just paid for my drink in silence, praying for a sinkhole to open. FML
Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
smiller0789 3
That's unfortunate. God is cockblocking you.
powersticks 16
Well at least you know that he never gets drunk and does stupid stuff.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (67)
zoffix 0
OP, I don't get where the FML is... Just how MANY guys would go to a bar to drink water and not get wasted like a pig? The way you are going with this... I bet in 10 years you'll come back and post this FML: "Today, my husband went to get wasted in the bar again. I'm a mother of three and we don't have any food. FML." FYI for being an idiot.
Mortanious 0
So what!
Butterbuns 1
Uh, the bartender who has to be sober enough to be able to make your damn drinks and handle money?
danielleFML 0
Good job on having confidence! Total FYL.
blastvortex 4
Blast it, not again! Have you any idea what you've done!? You just ripped a hole in the space-time continuum! Thanks a bunch! Now time itself is unraveling and tearing the universe at its very seams! The entirety of reality is being devoured as we speak! The Armageddon is upon us! N-N-N-NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dvd175 5
Are you currently medicated?
antiprettysin 0
In addition to "your life sucks", and "you deserved it", there needs to be a "this is stupid, your life is fine" button. Because guess what, this is stupid your life is fine.
chineseninja 0
smooth. maybe you're just a loser
athame1983 0
so the **** what......
DecayDance_fml 0
I don't see how a hot guy drinking water could be bad. Really, it's good. Now you know he's not an alcoholic. But seriously, pointless FML?
beachbabie 0
stupid. why was this published???