Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met a guy who said he thinks he's in love with my sister. As a joke, I told him that my sister cheats on everyone. I get home to find my sister crying, because some 'person' told her boyfriend that she's cheating on him. FML
Today, while at my brother's funeral, my girlfriend decided to tell me she'd been sleeping with him. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML
Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML
Today, I came home to find my brother making out with my girlfriend while taking a selfie. FML
Today, my brother asked his wife for a divorce, but she got so mad at him that he backtracked and told her it was a prank I'd put him up to. She’s still mad as hell at him, but thanks to his lie my name is now mud in our entire family. I was at work all day, and I did nothing wrong. FML
Today, my friend called to say my boyfriend was at a diner with another woman. I immediately went and caught them in a deep conversation. I slapped him and yelled "Who's this bitch!?" It turns out she's his half sister. FML
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Top comments
LouisianaBob 9
You can't even take the time to simply have a conversation?
RochelleRedvines 8
You read jokes while video chatting?
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Comments (103)
Calyx_fml 22
With you?
LouisianaBob 9
You can't even take the time to simply have a conversation?
comedybreak 20
Exactly why are you even looking at jokes while comforting?
demonmonkey 13
Maybe OP was going to send him the joke and was reading it to see if it was good enough?
Mariaa5411 0
Maybe to make him laugh
MoonPhase123 4
Yeah, I agree that OP should have taken the time to have a conversation with his/her brother but OP did say that he said it out of the blue. Wrong timing on reading jokes I suppose.
youjustmademelol 4
OP didn't know there brother would say that. Don't worry brothers and sisters can not stay out if fights I think it's almost impossible... That sucks though, he has bad timing
LolFMLnot 10
I don't think he'll ignore your call till his 90 years old. So don't worry OP, sooner or later he'll talk to you.
Mercury03 13
#35 You say you hate grammar nazis but you figuratively put a bulls-eye on your back. I'm not trying to start shit but a little education goes a long way in keeping people off your back.
ProhibitionRose 14
Umm OP said that his brother said his girlfriend cheated on him out of the blue. Meaning OP wasn't comforting him when he was reading the joke. Bad timing though :(
ssnowywinter 0
No, 57, read it again.
willyboy95 2
dude totally agree, what a doushe
desireev 18
70- You read it again. It says that they were telling jokes and talking, or what not, and as she was about to tell the punchline of a funny joke, he told her about his cheating girlfriend, out of the blue. Which means that he brought up that conversation while they were talking about something else and joking around. So, no.. You're wrong. You need to read it again. OP did no wrong. She was still laughing from the jokes when he outed his news about his girlfriend.
tiffanynickole 8
No, you're wrong. She said she was chatting with him. That doesn't mean they were actually talking at the moment. And she read the punch line not said the punch line. Key words.
jtthegr8 26
They were chatting - as she read the punch line he said gf was cheating - it was just bad timing...that's what happened
desireev 18
83- Normally, when you're 'chatting', you're talking to the person you're 'chatting' with. And since you're wanting to get severely technical about it, never once did I say she 'said' the punchline! I said '...and as she was about to TELL the punchline...' And the word 'tell' could be either saying it or reading it or reciting it. Whichever you choose. So, no.. I'm not wrong. I gave a break-down summary of the FML to someone and you went anal and tried to be Miss Technical. I don't need your assistance. But nice try! Thanks anyway! :)
whycantisignup 24
"Out of the blue" READ THE FML
comedybreak 20
YDI. It's not hard to keep in laughter.
poprocksss73 7
You deserve it for not pulling yourself together and comforting him.
yahoowizard 16
Like you've never had a situation where you let out a laugh at an appropriate time
poprocksss73 7
I've never taken it far enough that someone would ignore me, no.
yahoowizard 16
Well, it's not as much OPs fault that his brother is ignoring him, unless OP has failed to mention that he was reading the jokes on the side. I mean, even if OP was a complete jerk, that's not something that he would laugh at. Not saying it's the brothers fault either, it's just a case of misunderstanding.
LeapOfFaith 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
E-mail him explaining what happened..shit happens.. Relax and talk to him. Maybe you can get him an his girlfriend back together. That would definitely help to redeem yourself..
RadPenny 6
Why would you want them back together if she cheated on him?
Awsumuzzie 12
"People change" though!
nerobluerose 10
Offer to help him hide the body. That will repair your relationship.
RochelleRedvines 8
You read jokes while video chatting?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
You say that like it's a sin... It isn't.
RochelleRedvines 8
Yeah, but it is pretty damn stupid.
addiizcherry 0
No, sometimes I will be on DYAC and FML while video chatting and occasionally I'll laugh, but usually my friends think they're being funny and goof off alot more.
RochelleRedvines 8
I just think it'd be pretty distracting from listening to your friend talk. Plus, in that other FML a girl was doing the same thing and she ended up picking her nose on camera...
addiizcherry 0
Lol but I don't pick my nose. Besides- I'm a multi-tasker.
ExtremeEncounter 32
Who says they were using a webcam?
Valdrek 26
He will get over it. It may be best for him to be angry at you anyway to distract him from his situation.
SmallyBigs 9
Or tell him the joke and maybe it'll cheer him up and show that OP is trying to help.
LouisianaBob 9
Maybe you and he have the same sense of humor and you can send him the link
RadPenny 6
He won't answer any of her calls. What makes you think he'll go to the link.
SexyQueen0905 24
Don't multi-task while video chatting. That's bound to blow up in your face.
nofearjenshere 12
This was probably the same person that picked their nose while video chatting.
LaColombianita 26
Or the one that was sitting on the toilet and accepted the video chat from her crush xD
ss_20_xx 14
Thank you for being such a helpful sister.
xMiss_Maggot 7
how do u know op is a girl?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Because anonymous also means female. Duh!
SuperDerp 8
Because if OP was a guy his brother would punch him if they still live in the same houehold.