Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I was riding my bike, I saw a bunch of cute guys checking me out. Not paying attention, I then ran into a parked police car. Besides getting laughed at, I got a ticket for damaging police property. FML
Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML
Today, at a restaurant, I noticed a really hot girl leaving with her friend. A few minutes later they came back, laughing uncontrollably, and announced that some moron forgot to put on their parking brake and the car was rolling into the full parking lot. It was my car. They watched me chase it. FML
Today, I was looking at the map on my phone whilst walking down a street. I heard the sound of a bike behind me so I moved to let the cyclist past. He snatched the phone out of my hand and sped off. FML
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML
Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML
Today, I watched as a guy hit my car, laugh when he saw me running towards him, and drive away. FML
Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML
Today, as I was taking a walk, I heard a cyclist and so I wanted to move to the other side of the sidewalk for them. It turns out that I walked directly in front of them instead. Nearly scared them to death. FML
Today, I was sitting on my bike texting when someone snatched my phone and ran. Like an idiot, I jumped off my bike and ran after him. He then ran in a big circle, got on my bike and sped off. FML
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Top comments
Mr40Hands 5
Poor little girl
KushMastaDisasta 3
"Today I was playing in the park, minding my own business, when some guy ran me over on their bike. FML"
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Comments (157)
robc32ca 4
Hmm were the guys in the car cops?
Victofrenchey 0
What I am reallly wondering is : why were you being chased!?!
charlieohcharlie 12
I thought more people would've asked this, I wonder why you were being chased!
fuhkinsupah 0
im thumbin u down cuz ur pic makes me wanna slap you
fashionistaGirll 0
I think she secretly wishes she can pull off that kind of face pic like other girls... :p
mylifesucks12345_fml 0
Douch
mlebethbear 0
wow!! I hope the girl is ok!!!!
OsirisFaction_fml 5
She should have dodged.
SwimjettSarett 2
poor girl hopefully u don't weigh ALOT OP, you would crush her!!
FruityLoooons 8
Was it a maniacal laugh? Because I can totally see that right now, for some reason.
lajaynay 15
It was probably more like, "hehe, bitches."
bizarre_ftw 22
I have no idea why but I first read that as "mechanical laugh" Honestly, I was very confused
TheFunSideOfTheB 2
I think your right 33