Today, I was looking at the map on my phone whilst walking down a street. I heard the sound of a bike behind me so I moved to let the cyclist past. He snatched the phone out of my hand and sped off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting on my bike texting when someone snatched my phone and ran. Like an idiot, I jumped off my bike and ran after him. He then ran in a big circle, got on my bike and sped off. FML
Today, a stranger asked to borrow my phone since his had died. As he was using it, he kept walking away and I had to chase him because he was walking too far. He turned around, yelled, "Stop following me, asshole!" and punched me, knocking me out cold. When I came to, I realized the fucker stole my phone. FML
Today, to keep my phone safe while I went on some rides, I took it out of my pocket so I could put it in my bag. Just as I pulled it out, a woman ran into me, knocking my phone to the ground and breaking the screen. FML
Today, as I was taking a walk, I heard a cyclist and so I wanted to move to the other side of the sidewalk for them. It turns out that I walked directly in front of them instead. Nearly scared them to death. FML
Today, I was walking home down a small street while listening to my iPod. I really got into the music, and started to dance really badly, only to realise there was a car following me, trying to get past. FML
Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
Today, my bike was stolen. These things happen, so I went to work. On my walk to work, a girl pulls up on my bike and says I needed to fix the brakes, someone could kill themselves. She hands the bike to me and runs off. Not even 3 minutes pass before police surrounded me and accused me of stealing my own bike. FML
Today, I found a guy getting out of my car with my GPS. He started running and I chased him. We eventually reached a dead end and he gave it back to me. I took it back from him and said, "Sorry..." FML
Today, I was chased on my bike by a couple of guys in a car. I rode into a public park to cut through and try to lose them. I looked by to check if they were following me, but they had to stop. I laughed, looked forward, and rammed into a little girl. FML
Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML
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Top comments
larrena2377 26
I would say call the police, but....
worldclassrager 41
If only bikes had plates to report
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Comments (99)
conman531 23
Chase after him and run him over. That's just a suggestion though.
meepmerp 20
OP will literally have to RUN him over
PIGaming 21
#1, I personally have never been able to defy physics. When did first learn you could?
joseph19921992 10
Cyclists are assholes.
PIGaming 21
Thats like saying all black people are thieves. You are an true ignorant asshat.
Lomus 24
Wrong. The vast majority are actually nice people. It's 1%-ers like these that give us a bad name.
BeastOfJupiter 7
#36 Humans are assholes. We have such potential for greed and dishonesty it's sickening.
tareqateik 4
run him overrr!!!
tareqateik 4
you should do that
LCPLStewie 23
Well that's a little rash #36.... "Gets on bike" instant asshole!
FML_Elle 17
Hahaha I love OPs username. Is that what you call it?
larrena2377 26
I would say call the police, but....
Federgirl 19
that wasn't very nice of him...
ComoEsJuan 24
Too bad the map couldn't tell OP where the thieves were.
GirlGamer12345 22
Thank you for pointing that out for us. We had no idea..
PIGaming 21
#17 that really only works in your favour when thr comment is downvoted.
Queensland 27
It must be asshole day. Try a phone tracker? Track my iPhone is one for apple products.
meepmerp 20
Well, it'll be too late to get a tracker since the phone is already stolen
Queensland 27
You can get a tracker on a friend's iPhone or iPad or find my iPhone website.
worldclassrager 41
If only bikes had plates to report
kaablam 17
You are on to something here, I feel it!
Lomus 24
If that were the case, pedestrians would need plates too wouldn't they? The only reason cars and motorbikes have them is because they're deathtraps.
autumndobbs 11
Hope you found where you were going.
woainishamu 21
Well, now you can get a newer fancy phone ;).
larrena2377 26
Hopefully OP has insurance on it
LandoKid 9
Sorry, but you deserve it when you don't pay attention. At least look up once in a while, or stop on the side.
MisUnFortunate 31
Sorry but you're ******* stupid if you think someone deserves to have their phone stolen because they were looking at a map instead of being lost so they could make sure there weren't any phone stealing bikers around.
FML_Elle 17
I agree with #11. Phone or not, the thief was coming from behind so either way OP was kind of screwed. She doesn't have eyes on the back of her head. Using a phone as a map is using your resources; in my opinion she didn't deserve it.
Ihavegas 22
this may have been an opportunistic crime. the phone must have been clearly in view. op wasnt paying enough attention to her surroundings and the asshole snatched. There's been a few crimes like these mainly purses and handbag. as a driver I see people walking around glued to their phones and tech gear, even crossing the road without looking. I once saw someone on his mac book at a bus stop in the middle of the night using it as a camera!!? fact is there will always be crime and you have to do your part in protecting yourself and preventing it from happening to you. lets hope you get your phone back and learn from this.
arandomusernameaa 20
When you use your phone it is always going to be in clear view ...
andiesaur 18
So this is how you justify thieves... I've always wondered.
Ki11erC 18
27: Tell that to some using a Bluetooth headset.
kaablam 17
#19 Makes a very valid point. Do not make yourself into a target and you are much more likely not to be. Mostly no one deserves to have their phone snatched up like that, though.
Stryker78cRS 15
@19 exactly... I live in the 3rd safest town in the us and still worry about my phone being stolen
Lomus 24
#48: You can't look at the screen with a headset.
olpally 33
Did you run after the cyclist? I would have chased after them! What a jerk!