Today, I was called a "whore," a "demon," a "piece of shit," and a "disrespectful bitch." All of this happened because I wouldn't let my mother-in-law borrow my car. This is a woman with multiple speeding tickets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
Today, I found out my mother drives my car. I was okay with it; I don't use it all the time and she's my mother. However, I was not okay with the multiple speeding tickets that came through in the post. "You're the registered keeper, so why should I pay?" FML
Today, I got a ticket for "suspicious driving" because my total shit of a mother kept tugging on the wheel to annoy me, and I still had to pay it. FML
Today, while in the car with my mom, she gave me a lecture about how bad of a driver I am. During that process she ran a red light and hit a car. FML
Today, my mother started cursing at a lady for tooting her horn at her in traffic, because there was "no need for road rage." When I tried to calm her down, she slammed on the brakes and told me to get out and walk. FML
Today, my mom once again yelled at me for "driving erratically." She texts while driving 70 miles per hour on the highway, but apparently driving through a yellow light is "reckless." FML
Today, I ran into my mother-in-law, who I absolutely can't stand, with my car at 5 mph by accident. She jumped out in front of me after a particularly nasty argument, but my husband won't believe me and neither will the police. FML
Today, my mother-in-law threw bricks at my car. Her defense? I shouldn't have parked in her "brick throwing spot", in my own driveway. FML
Today, my neighbor yelled at me for driving recklessly. I was going 35 mph, and she was stopped in the middle of a road around a blind curve. My "reckless driving" was slamming on the brakes so I wouldn't hit her. FML
Today, my mom called me a "heartless bitch" for eating the last Hot Pocket. This is coming from a woman who, just last week, faked having cancer to get out of a speeding ticket. FML
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Top comments
thisisafunnyname 12
If you change the order of the letters in mother-in-law you get woman hitler
olpally 33
Sounds like she's the "*****, demon, piece of shit and disrespectful bitch" fyl op.. She doesn't deserve to borrow your car..
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Comments (147)
meganfoxsbitch 0
Selfish much??
airforce987 20
Uhhh...no. I would never let anyone borrow my car even if they have a clean record. I paid for it and it's way too valuable. I would only let someone drive my car if I was in the passenger seat and was not physically able to drive. I don't mind helping someone out and driving them somewhere, but they don't get to drive, let alone borrow it.
fo_86 0
Amen!!
aikokohitori 0
16, maybe it was directed to the woman with the speeding tickets, implying that she's selfish for calling someone offensive titles when they wouldn't lend her their car. Maybe.
1221jamw 11
27, I don't think so. But, you know he only posted two words to get first. There needs to be like a 10 letter minimum so people don't go saying, "first!" Everybody who does that can kiss my ass.
HatefulPilot 0
I'm glad nobody asks to borrow my helicopter! :3
1221jamw 11
Fudge I thought your reply was to number one. Well still take what I said into consideration. I also hate anti flood. Very much. I hope they take it off. Have a nice day:)
sr101998 0
92- Can I get an Amen. Haliula
paintingxflowers 8
I might be the only one but I liked OP's creative way of censoring the curse words.
dinoluvsrawr 2
30- then they would write the word "first" ten times
AngrehPirate 0
My pirate ship is really precious, no1 but me navigates it.
WaterPoloLove3 0
I like the upside down exclamation points(:
jessaiee 17
Maybe #1 was trying to be sarcastic...
airforce987 20
135 - you obviously haven't been here long...
KelpForBrains 0
OMG. Are you ser¡ous? That's terr¡ble!
rohanmo 9
136 - Win...
periwinkle95 10
Okay. I could've swore the first time this was posted it was normal. Then yesterday the i's in this fml were replaced by upside down exclamation marks. Now they're normal. Am I crazy? Or does everyone see this?
officer_nasty 0
ino right
olpally 33
Sounds like she's the "*****, demon, piece of shit and disrespectful bitch" fyl op.. She doesn't deserve to borrow your car..
olpally 33
And time to smack a bitch as well op..
1221jamw 11
I agree with the first comment, but don't you think her husband might get a little mad if she slapped the Mother in Law? :)
olpally 33
True.. But it would be worth it.. Haha
IndiRae 9
¡ Completely agree w¡th you. Her behav¡or was completely ¡rrat¡onal. What a bitch.
Jaxx66 21
No she deserves to be smacked. Not to mention, OP.... All those make you a succubus. Congrats. :)
Horde 8
If my mother called my wife *****, I'd be the first to pimp slap my mom!
cmyk 19
And her son says nothing? Sounds like a lovely woman. Or something -.-
Belzebug 14
Does the son even know?
cmyk 19
I would think he does. As it's his mum. And usually if a moter in law acts like this it wont be the only time, or even first time.. Unless op dont tell him..
thisisafunnyname 12
If you change the order of the letters in mother-in-law you get woman hitler
chocol8m 6
Awesome!!
nixter5 18
That fits perfectly!!
ultimatum946 0
That is a funny name
danielwilliams57 6
Haha that's going to become my new favorite
SemperFi_23 6
Got that off a rage face meme, nice.
MinecraftDragon 5
That was extremely clever. *claps*
exotica_fml 6
punch her in the stomach, shut the old hag up
MikeDa1Da 14
Yeah, that would definitely solve all of their problems. Good solution.
dumboears 8
That wouldn't make OP any better then her mother in law.
lmaoatall 6
Kick her in the ass as hard as you can and see how fast she can fly!
vareladj97 0
Yea plz
Enslaved 38
Now you know what she thinks of you. Aren't you glad you told her no?
mom2pen 4
Get in the car and LEAVE!!!
stacy5_fml 0
Why does it matter though? The speeding ticket goes toward her and affects her license. They dont give a ticket to your car. Common sense
amoyer0418 1
COMMON SENSE YO!!
mike3775 39
What if she gets a parking ticket and not a speeding ticket? What if she gets in a wreck while speeding? It goes on the OP's insurance.
1221jamw 11
That's not a common sense comment. It's common sense to know a common sense comment.
Zomg_Okay 27
10 - What good is OP not getting the speeding ticket if the car is wrecked as a result of this speeding?
whynotbliss 18
Most Common cause of accidents, speeding! Didn't think that one all the way through...
Ciraxas 7
It's not about her getting the ticket, it's about what the speeding tickets suggest about her recklessness when driving.
bsbuddy 0
I received a notice from Dept. of Motor Vehicles when someone got a ticket while driving a car registered in my name, had to make sure they went to court and/or paid the fine, otherwise, I was responsible. SO, don't let that reckless bitch drive your car!!
KiddNYC1O 22
10- You dum- never mind. SIGH.
alexowitz 8
Yes that's true, but it also means that she's more likely to get in an accident and by the sounds of it will prob not want to pay for the damages. :(
old09 11
Tell her too ride her broom
Headcrab 29
LMAO!
Anubyte 0
You sir, are full of win
cheefer 0
Well I did spill my soup all over my gray genitals. The worst part was that it was chicken noodle and I couldn't figure out which one was my penis!!!!