Today, I finally got the hearing aids that I've needed for years. My dog quickly learned that if he quietly sneaks up behind me and barks, it'll scare the hell out of me. It's now his favorite game. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I bought a device that plays a high-pitched sound to teach my dog to quit barking. She's smart enough to learn that as long as she barks loud enough and long enough, she can't hear it. Quite the opposite effect to what I was anticipating. FML
Today, our deaf old dog not only barks for no reason while lying comfortably on her dog bed, lacking for nothing, she now also barks in her sleep. And not those dreamy little yips either; full barks, loud enough to be heard in the next room. Which is where I sleep. FML
Today, our dog is old and deaf, and has figured out she just needs to bark if she needs to be let inside. Unfortunately, she's also a bit senile, so sometimes she just barks for no reason, while lying still and quite comfortably on her dog bed, staring at nothing. FML
Today, my roommate switched jobs and now goes to work in the morning. His dog has declared that going on a barking frenzy right after he leaves is a great thing to do. Earplugs don't work - I move too much and they fall out too easily. Only 30 more days until he moves out. FML
Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML
Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML
Today, I bought noise-canceling headphones because my neighbors are loud. The first night I wore them, I completely missed the sound of my smoke alarm battery dying. Instead of hearing a faint beep every minute, I woke up to six missed calls from my roommate asking why I wasn't answering. FML
Today, my dog is much too fond of barking at me loudly and at length for no reason. So is my girlfriend. FML
Today, my fiancé and I moved into a new home a few houses away from our previous one. We were excited about not hearing our roommate's dog howling non-stop anymore. We can hear him from the new house. Very clearly. FML
Today, I was trying to fall asleep. Unfortunately, my next-door neighbor's baby began to cry. I closed the window and rolled over, unable to hear the crying anymore. My dog's hearing is better than mine, and so he started barking. Goodbye, good night's sleep. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Shabnam Moghal 14
Take them out for a while. When he doesn't get the same reaction the next few times, he should hopefully quit it. We all hope to HEAR how that goes! (Sorry I couldn't help it)
signekrogjensen 16
You should film it
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (14)
Shabnam Moghal 14
Take them out for a while. When he doesn't get the same reaction the next few times, he should hopefully quit it. We all hope to HEAR how that goes! (Sorry I couldn't help it)
signekrogjensen 16
You should film it
Talented73 54
Hopefully, his bark is worse than his bite.
Talented73 54
Use a rolled up newspaper. Maybe he will realize he is barking up the wrong tree.
RichardPencil 32
When he does that, you need to yell, “No!,” smack him, then go change your pants. You can’t reprimand a dog AFTER you’ve changed your soiled undergarments.
gobiteme2 34
And we believe that an old dog can't learn new tricks.
Glowworm56 27
This is actually hilarious to picture.
davecross 11
You have the smartest dog every
davecross 11
Ever!
Lobby_Bee 18
It's payback for all the times you fake throw the ball/stick.
tonyfan00 38
HEY HOOMAN CAN U HEAR ME?!!? U CAN! KTHXBYE