Today, I was at the library using a computer to order a package. A man sat down next to me mumbling to himself while staring at me. As I got up to go to the printer, he pointed at me and screamed, "I will burn you alive and enjoy it!" All of my info including my address was still on the computer screen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at the library. I went near the computer section when I saw this man cursing and pounding his fists on a computer. He left. I thought I'd check it out. As I sat down, a librarian came over with the security guard and pointed at me. I'm now being fined for destroying public property. FML
Today, at the library, somebody left themselves logged in to Facebook on a public computer after they had left. Trying to teach them a lesson, I updated their Facebook status to something outrageous. That's when they came back to the computer after getting something from the printer. FML
Today, I was at the library, working with some classmates on our major semester project. I accidentally killed power to the row of computers by me. I've never had so many enraged faces looking at me before. FML
Today, before closing the library, someone came in to use the computer. He apparently forgot the password to his online banking, eventually getting so frustrated that he grabbed the monitor, yanked it from its cables, hurled it across the room, and stormed out. I don’t get paid enough for this. FML
Today, I offered help a customer to record his details, as he didn't have a scanner. He just stared at me, saying that he would never give any of his details if I typed them on my phone, as I could "do something else" without him knowing. He ended up canceling his orders and got upset on his way out. FML
Today, I was at the library doing research for my midterm. All of the computers were in use, so I decided to use my laptop instead. Ten minutes later, I was confronted and kicked out. My offense? Unauthorized use of the library's so-called "Free Public WiFi". FML
Today, I tried to return a library book sneakily to avoid the overdue fine. I slid it on the counter but the scanner screamed, lights flashed, and the librarian announced my humiliatingly overdue name like a game show host. FML
Today, my friend wasn't responding to my whispers in the library, so I walked over and very slightly moved his chair. At that exact moment, the librarian walked in. Regardless of our efforts to tell her anything, she got us banned from the library. FML
Today, I was sitting on a train, doing homework for my programming class, when a man sat in the seat next to me. He must have been a programmer too, because he spent the next few hours staring at my screen and laughing whenever I made a mistake. FML
Today, I was in the middle of enjoying a really good book while in a waiting room. Someone saw what I was reading and thought it would be cool if she leaned over and told me everything that happens. FML
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Top comments
esp_superstar 10
You can run but u can't hide...
melij99 5
And now you know the importance of leaving Personal Identifiable Information open on a public computer.
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Comments (111)
jerrylee123 8
I want to cry just reading this ^^ Pick up some pepper spray OP!!!
zandalee 20
What the hell kind of library was this? In a phyciatric hospital? Did you tell someone in charge?
DocBastard 40
It's alright, because you love the way it hurts.
Enslaved 38
An Eminem song quote? Love it!
olpally 33
Just going to stand there and watch me burn, but that's alright cuz I love the way you lie.... Edit:: feel free to correct my lyrics.
redbluegreen 41
But the real question is what kind of weirdo likes being burned alive?
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
20, you left the door open to be corrected. It's "because," not "cuz." She specifically said the "be" sound in the song. Go cry in the corner, you dirty, dirty *****.
olpally 33
You took that correction too far, 53... Go back to family guy, shamus...
SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18
Let me be clear in that if you ever, EVER reference my nickname to a character in Family Guy again, I will find you, I will burn you alive, and I will enjoy it. That's shit not to be trifled with. The Shamus I'm know by has nothing to do with Family Guy. Anf my name is Matt. There's no person named Matt in family guy.
estes816 9
He probably says that to all the ladies.
SnipeFatPeople 6
World's Best Pickup Lines: 2012-2013 Edition
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
18- you're picture is ******* scary
pradip 26
I think he was trying to be funny. I'm gonna burn some fireworks and enjoy it. Happy Diwali
Onmyzephyr 5
And to you too!
JimSweatshirt 6
It makes me wonder. How many people that wrote an FML about being stalked or threatened actually got killed. Its not like we'd notice them on the news...
redbluegreen 41
All of them. The FML team is responsible for making sure all the threat/stalker FMLs are carried out for the sake of publishing accurate stories. They take their job very seriously.
ManInTheMachine 20
There is a graveyard in the heart of Paris made especially for these anonymous FMLers, and each says: "Here lies OP. We all agree your lives sucked, So we might as well give you some credit. R.I.P " It's very touching, really.
gczizza1997 15
I really hope you notified the security there or someone, this man is obviously not in the right state of mind.
Ja777 9
If I were you I'm not sure I would ever sleep again! That's some scary stuff!
Ayanpatel95 7
I'm pretty sure it was just meant to be an prank
FML_Whale 18
*a.
lolmandi 9
That can be considered a threat, tell the cops.
tehcyberman 9
Not just considered... That IS a threat!
EmoRockChic 11
There's a slight problem with that. OP doesn't know the weirdo that did it and probably won't be able to remember what he looked like