Today, I was at a public pool. A very fat kid yelled, "Cannon Ball!" He jumped right on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, a little kid accidentally ran into me at the pool. He apologized by biting my leg. FML
Slick moves
Today, I tried doing a backflip off the diving board into our hotel's swimming pool. Instead, I flopped into the pool so hard it sounded like a cannonball, and now my stomach is bright red. My friends will probably bring this up for the rest of our holiday. FML
Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML
Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML
Today, I was at the pool with two boys I babysit. The eldest wouldn't get out of the pool so I pretended to call his dad. He then ran out of the pool, pushed me down, grabbed my phone, chucked it into the pool and then ran back into the pool. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML
Nice try
Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML
Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML
Bounce off
Today, I embraced my inner child and went to a trampoline park with friends. I was having a blast until I attempted a somersault and ended up bouncing right into a group of screaming toddlers. I was escorted out by a concerned parent. FML
Top comments
itz_towelie 6
you got to be carefull when fat people are dealing with their arch nemesis gravity.
ImaginaryFoe 1
Erm, YDI for looking like water? Lawsuit! Trolling doesn't suit me. OP, when you hear someone at a pool shout "Cannonball" GTFO! Bad things are about to happen. FYL
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Comments (424)
ItsMeChrisB 0
these are the fml's when I ask, "why does he/she deserve this?!"
StarUnRama666 0
Wow that blows >.>
travisrocker 0
ydi for swimming mere a fat kid! jks that sucks
claiiire_fml 17
62- stfu if u think ur fat then do something about it instead of bitching about it and ******* up the thread. not everyone wants 20 emails from FML if they're following this saying that some chubby attention starved weirdo is trying to make themself look bad for sympathy and compliments. gtfo
CallMeHush 1
Fat kids are so much fun.
NuMuzik 0
don't you look to see who is yelling cannonball idiot
DRockBod87 0
you must have been pretty close to him cause I doubt he could have jumped very far
claiiire_fml 17
242 is SEXY(; id do a cannon ball and land on him Anyday
MetalmaidenDeth 0
thanks. but my policy is "you ain't willin' to commit' i ain't willin' to submit."
claiiire_fml 17
370- if you aint willing to submit, I'm not willing to hit xD that's what it should say
iondadola 0
Did you yell "fat ass"?
apfunction 0
So sue him. it's his fault for not looking where he jumped. you can really milk this if you do it right.