Today, I was at a dance. I was griding with this guy when I felt something move in his pants. I stood up and stepped away. He replied with "Don't flatter yourself, it was my phone". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML
Today, a guy I like asked me to a dance. Trying to act modest and at the same time compliment him, I told him, "You could do so much better, though." After thinking for a moment, he replied, "You're right, I could. Never mind," and walked away. FML
Rave on
Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML
Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML
Shopping spree
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
I hate dancing
Today, I was at a wedding and I reluctantly joined the dance floor. As soon as I started dancing, I felt my trousers rip. Trying to save face, I kept dancing, hoping no one would notice. A few minutes later, I realized my silk boxer shorts were completely visible to the entire party. FML
Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Best night out ever
Today, after a few drinks with some mates at a bar, we were invited to the dancefloor with some girls. After some dancing and flirting, I felt a cheeky squeeze on my backside, and so I quickly returned the favour without looking back. A few minutes later at the bar, I realised my wallet was gone. FML
Top comments
pewp 5
well, im assuming you are in high school since you went to a dance. so you may not have learned this quite yet, when you rub up on a guy's d*ck, it gets hard. what did you think you were rubbing up on when you were grinding with him? and what do you mean you stood up? were you laying down and grinding?
citylights 0
hhahahahahahahahahah
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Comments (100)
RawrToast 0
Go him~!
RavensRule97 0
um... he prolly just got a boner and didnt wanna admit it
ohfrick 0
Moral of the story: don't grind, kids. :D I fail to see how that belongs at a dance. At least wait until you're outside, geez.
TEAZO 0
well if you grind and you grind well u should be feelen a lil suttin suttin. or else dont grind if you cant handle it. XD
jdpwnsyou 0
Are you kidding me? What do you think happens when you grind on a guy? If he did get a boner that means he's probably at LEAST semi attracted to the way you look. Get a life.
gettingowned 0
if you're going to step away from a guy when you feel something that might be penis then wait until you are out of middle school to try and grind again. That usually means you are doing a good job.
Linkshot 0
If you're grinding, expect that to happen. Really, do you think a boner means "I want to rape you."? It's a natural reaction that can be controlled. If you're simply slow dancing, the same thing can happen. Don't get mad; the guy is already embarassed as he most likely didn't want it to happen; disappointment will only make it worse.
Blehstefany 0
Lol, you should have been like. 'Oh, damn, that reminds me, I have to call a friend. So, can I use your phone?' I mean HEY! You gave him a grind, he should be kind. Scam to see the truth!
dantheman_fml 0
hahahhaa what a funny ass kid " dont flatter urself" im sorry but thats just great....
OMGyoupeople 0
i think his reaction was kinda rude. dont flatter YOURSELF boy!