Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly one year. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a cat. I now have a cat and no girlfriend. FML
Today, it's been three years since my sister gave me a kitten. Coincidentally, it’s also been three years since I've had sex. FML
Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML
Today, I moved in with my boyfriend. Up until now, I thought my cat was the only four year-old I had to deal with. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My wife gave me a card that read, "You made it to 36!" It's my 35th birthday. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML
Today, I got a promotion. I was really excited until I realized that the only friend I had to celebrate with was my pet cat. FML
Today, the last of my close friends announced she is pregnant. Meanwhile, I'm single and my nest is empty. Well, not exactly, because even my freaking cat is pregnant. FML
Today, I'm celebrating New Year's with my cat. I made her a cake. FML
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Top comments
HandaPitler 1
One down. 99 to go
lolfood 24
Better to have no man than a shitty one.
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Comments (86)
ouibijou 15
Doesn't matter; Got a cat.
theunlovedemo 10
The comment from your sister was unnecessary, but cats are cute :) Dw OP, you'll find someone! And Happy Birthday :D
Attica 20
Your sister is a bitch. There are people much older than that who are single. You'll find your special someone if you want to, OP. Maybe in the meantime your cat can become famous on the internet.
Omniprism 15
Cats are great companions...other than the litter box but I would get on match.com just for fun and when you marry that millionaire doctor husband you can shove it in her face.
sexygirl25 3
Being married and getting a husband should not be the main goal in life!!
amisenho 11
Thank you! Everyone has his/her own goals, so trying to conform to one's model of how life should be spent is counter-intuitive.
Quiet_one 22
If you don't want/can't keep the cat, you can still try to find a better home for it (please don't just abandon it). Try to find places you can advertise it. Vet's offices sometimes have a bulletin board for lost/found pets and pets that need new homes, so that might be a good place to start.
twinkiefeets 17
There is nothing wrong with being 35 and single. You're just waiting for the right one. Never settle.
MeLoveCats 7
absolutely nothing wrong with 35 and single. and now you have a cat with you! when you find the right one and bring him over, you'll be adding one to the house. if he's allergic, just give the cat back to your sister.
thisiscool19 14
Call him fluffy no matter if he isn't fluffy. Its just a cute name for a kitty
crystyx3 9
cats are amazing you're wepcome