Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my cat to the vet. As the vet reached to examine him, he hissed, then clawed me instead, and then ran straight into a wall. Now we’re both sitting at the vet's, scowling and injured. FML
Today, I know there's something wrong with my cat when his meowing starts to sound really weird. But just now, his meow has gotten so unusual that he actually scared the shit out of me. I thought it was an entirely different cat that got into my house before I looked back. Yeah, he's going to the vet. FML
Today, I was at the doctor's getting a check up. He asked me if I was allergic to anything, to which I blurted out, "Cats." He gave me a weird look and said, "Don't worry, I won't give you cats." FML
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
Today, I took my cat to the vet for a routine check-up. The vet asked if my cat was stressed at all, so I confidently replied, "No, he's a pretty chill little dude." That's when my cat decided to hiss and spit his way to the top of the shelves on the other side of the examination room. He's not as chill as I thought. FML
Today, I took my cat to the vet for a regular check-up. In the waiting room, she escaped from her carrier and created chaos, knocking over supplies, and hissing at everyone. FML
Today, I took my wife's cat to the vet for her yearly check up. I'm finishing the day at the hospital with multiple bite wounds and a deep gash in my leg. My wife chose to comfort her cat instead. FML
Today, I was the designated emotional support person for my friend's mom as she went to have her sick cat put down. The cat was aggressive towards the male vet. She said, "She doesn't like men" to which the vet replied, "Well, soon that won't be a problem." The willpower it took both of us to not yell at him, or worse… FML
Today, I'm sitting at the vet's office while they run expensive tests on my cat. This is to make sure he doesn't have a bowel obstruction from eating the condom that my partner and I used last night. FML
Today, during my shift as a vet nurse, I picked up a gorgeous cat for cuddles, only to discover it was covered with pee. And now I am too. I still have 4 hours of my shift. FML
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Top comments
Mads_1234 28
I would switch vets if I were you OP.
lo39dell 10
maybe he has more cats to check out?? Lets hope it's something like that op.
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Comments (105)
imonkeyface 9
At least he seems to have a sense of humor, even if he is a creep dog.
alivak 6
Maybe he is a pussy fan ;D
wvcheesehead1 9
Wonder if he prefers doggy style?
football98_fml 20
you have 2 dogs? cool
jannatanelle 5
A comment like this is very riskè, especially from a professional! It's all in the delivery and he's appearntly doing something wrong to come off as a creep, any actually funny guy could pull this off!
BreynHope 11
That is hilarious haha. Obviously not for you, but for everybody else reading this.
georjayy 11
Well you gotta dammit. He wasn't being a pussy about it.
ballettillidie 8
Reply: oh yes it wil
FrankHotpants 31
To which you should of replied, yes..yes it is.
LyraAlluse 25
Did he follow that statement up with, "I'm also going to see lots of dogs"? Because if he didn't, I would run far, far away OP.