Today, I took away my 8-year-old daughter's toy for throwing it too many times. She then said, "I need a beer." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 8 year-old adopted daughter told me she wants me to take her back so another family can adopt her because I don't give her enough toys. FML
Today, my two year old daughter did not want to leave the toy store, when I picked her up she started screaming at the top of her lungs, "YOU'RE NOT MY DADDY!". FML
Today, I took away my daughter’s candy bar, saying, “Princesses never eat sweets.” She spent the next few hours crying, because she “didn’t want to be a princess anymore." FML
Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML
Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "That's what you get." FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML
Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML
Today, my 6-year-old daughter threw a tantrum in the middle of a store, all because I wouldn't buy her a pushup bra. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DerrickJames 33
Children are model learners. Be a better model or keep them around better models.
wheresmymary 22
They grow up so fast
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (69)
CliffyB03 28
Give her a taste and she'll make a disgusted face. She'll learn not to say things like that again.
hemiguy14 9
That sucks...but I still laughed.
RubixWar 8
I'm guessing she was referring to root beer
mzshannababy 16
that's so funny! not that it's ok for eight year olds to drink beer
JCRouzer29 27
Would use discipline myself, 8 is plenty old enough to know what you are saying.
1stones 8
Hand her back the toy lol
TigrexTeeth 16
Alcy see; Alcy do
hayahh1012 11
thats what happens when spoiled brats gets used to having everything and when they dont their angry brats who turn out to act like little bitches in their teenage years
DoomedGemini 38
Kinda stretching there don't you think? Let's look at the facts. 1. She has a toy 2. The toy was taken because she wouldn't stop throwing it, which kinda goes against your theory 3. She sighed and repeated something she could of heard anywhere. Yet you get that she's a spoiled brat that gets whatever she wants. Well then..
diaspora_fml 26
Parroting back what she likely hears daddy say when faced with difficulty teaches how she may live.
cassidysleiman 13
Well kids learn those types of things from what they observe others doing. Maybe she hears you, or someone else, saying that.