Today, I took a shower with my boyfriend. I tried to be adventurous and went to give him a blowjob, only to end up slipping and head-butting him in the balls. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML
Today, while in the shower with my boyfriend, I tried to heat things up by washing his knob with my loofa. He couldn't stop laughing and eventually laughed so hard that he slipped and fell. He now has a bruised butt while I have a missing toenail from catching his fall. Ouch. FML
Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a shower together for the first time. He was trying impress me and did some sort of dance move, he slipped, and when he fell he kicked my leg out causing me to fall and hit my face on the faucet. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my partner after his shower. He moved my hands up to push me against the wall. Instead of hitting the wall, my hands hit the shower rod. It fell on my face and I got a bloody nose. FML
Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when I lifted myself up a little bit. What I was not prepared for was my boyfriend leaning down to kiss my neck. We collided heads, hard. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were in the shower and things were getting heated. I tried to move position, but slipped and fell, bringing the shower curtain I'd grabbed onto down with me along its support rod. My ass hit the floor just as hard as the rod hit my head. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Definitely not the type of head he was expecting.
Krwman 8
Well, your heart is in the right place; even if the rest of you wasn't.
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Comments (147)
Bragi 12
Don't fret, OP, it happens a lot.
geehel_fml 8
Happens a lot? Head-butt in the nuts? You should have a strange life! luckily, I live faaaaaar away from you!
JustinJK 21
This has like never happened to me.
Waschlappen 23
I agree with you, maybe not head-butt in the nuts, but I have accidentally hit and kicked my boyfriend in the nuts a couple of times.
RedPillSucks 33
accidentally.... right...
funneh1 21
This made me cringe...and I don't even have any testicles...ouch.
samanthahaha 9
Lmbo! (Laughing my balls off)
TheIronFez 13
HA HA. HA. AH. So funny.
brandan020 10
i would say "your life sucks" id say "his life sucks" oh my lord...
BattyMomma 7
To prevent this from happening again: buy a shower mat.
redpanda39 10
I have a series of whimsical duck stickers in my tub.
siggy_mcsigx 22
Shower sex is always so awkward in reality xD
Cassandra2015 21
how is shower sex awkward ? I think it's pretty enjoyable to be honest ...
Exodiafinder687 58
It gets pretty awkward when you have so many people staring at you. That's the last time I have shower sex at the YMCA.
woodboys23 4
Uhhh Why
a1_z9 10
ok
a1_z9 10
It probably depends on the type of shower you have. The last time I tried it I decided it would be much better without being in a cramped slippery box with water getting in my eyes. The bathroom floor worked pretty well though!
tburkey17 9
I think this was funnier then the fml??
mergeterge 24
To people asking why: 1) water ironically make things LESS lubed 2) it is hard to find the right position in such a small place and 3) shit like this FML happens! Unlubed, cramped, and painful sex is not as fun as it seems in the movies.
Daelynn_17 19
#24 Haaaaaaaa. That's a classic. :-)
RedPillSucks 33
beats prison shower sex
ptellini 7
You sound like a really nice girlfriend.
SBittick 20
Lol, "Shower Head"
_Peppermint_ 34
Showers and sex are never a good mix. Been there, done that
jackroarrr 25
You're 16 FYL
knight2109 12
You did it wrong then. In my experience shower sex is pretty damn amazing.
jackroarrr 25
Well she's 12 so .. Ya.
_Peppermint_ 34
Last time I checked I was 16 but go ahead, think what you want
limabeans101029 21
Shower foreplay is good but I've never been very into shower-sex either. 48- It isn't everyone's cup of tea.
Smilez97 5
try it with some grip in the shower next time