Today, I told my younger brother that I'm a lesbian. Now he keeps asking me if I want to play rock, paper, vagina. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend told me that he was gay and that he is in love with my younger brother. FML
Today, I told my 10 year-old brother I was turning 23. He said, "You need to get a boyfriend." FML
Today, my brother came out to our parents. They weren't super happy with it, but they said that it was ok since they still had a straight son. I don't know how to tell them that I'm gay too. FML
Today, I had to explain to my little brother that my tampons weren't ear plugs. FML
Today, my older brother managed to convince my younger sister that she's actually a boy, and that she'll soon be getting a penis in the mail, which she excitedly told everyone she could. He convinced me of the exact same thing as well several years ago. FML
Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because she "wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML
Today, my sister gently asked me if I was gay. Turns out I've been without a boyfriend for so long that the whole family believes I secretly have a girlfriend. FML
Today, I tried proving to my best friend that I wasn't a lesbian by telling her I once liked her brother. She was mad because I never told her and now she's calling him. FML
Today, I thought I was going on a date. About 20 minutes into it, after giving her my arm to hold (like a true gentleman) it came up in conversation that my brother is gay. Her response: "Oh, so both you and your brother are gay?" FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 months decided to wrestle with my younger brother. He has gotten more action than I have. FML
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Top comments
luarasticks 13
technically, the joke would still work with the classic rock, paper, scissors.
gracehi 33
That sucks, although I'm guessing you don't.
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Comments (77)
artoozie13 15
If your brother is accepting and doing this to pick on you the way siblings do, then it would just be business a usual. He probably loves you in his annoying young brother ways.
anonamous14 9
****** should beat everything. After all it is used to give birth.
Gillett 23
True but some freaks of nature such as myself, are born via cesarean section.
the_aspect 28
the joke would be paper, rock, scissors, however, why would he throw the word ******? is he young to understand that body part very well and if he know what it means then he should understand.
8313girl 28
Scissoring is a lesbian sex act.
gonnawhupu 13
Congratulations on coming out and I hope your brother becomes more mature
The_Avatar 22
What did you think he would stop being your brother? He's supposed to be annoying
Doctor_W_H_O 18
Sorry OP, but that is pretty funny
Badkarma4u 17
That made me lol
redneckpunk 14
Wait shouldn't there be some form of scissoring in there since your a lesbian?
angeluv_2014 22
But scissors is a lesbian sex move? this just replaces a good, subtle joke with a painfully obvious, shitty joke
skyeyez9 25
Brothers can be jerks. Mine always called me a "n!gger." Despite me being asian and italian and we both have the same parents. He in't too bright either.