Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML
Today, I asked my wife how we could spice up our sex life. She wants me to dress up and talk like Joe Exotic. No, she wasn’t kidding. FML
Today, my husband's version of roleplaying was pretending that he actually wanted to have sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML
Today, my husband drunkenly confessed that he has a shit fetish and wants to watch me take a dump in the bathtub while he jerks off. Guess him saying he "didn't like kinky things" was a lie, then. FML
Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML
Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML
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Top comments
twinkiefeets 17
Oh deer!
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
At least you can be his sexy little vixen! You don't hoof to do it of course, but fur your husband you might want to get into the festive spirit and have a little fawn with him
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Comments (116)
twinkiefeets 17
Oh deer!
happle 21
No kidding.
SexyQueen0905 24
Deer lord! I bet he gave you those doe eyes. What did you say?
OnlyAvailableID 28
Doe, a deer, a female deer.
inzunza 5
You might be a redneck if.......
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
31-Your picture matches with all of this perfectly
Steve95401 49
OP's husband is going to Thumper. Bambi is probably turning redder than Rudolph's nose.
eruditecognition 10
"honey, be a deer and bend over"
VorpikeII 17
OP's Husband must be really horny.
happle 21
Antler-y*
LifelessStars 22
well at least he's in the holiday spirit
RedPillSucks 33
that wasn't his nose that was red
sens3sfailing 25
What the hell was? Does your penis turn red when you get turned on? You should probably see a doctor about that
TML329 14
Now op's husband needs a red suit and shout "ho ho ho"
itsaasif 3
Well said gal ;)
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen... I hope he plans on playing Cupid, but Rudolph is pretty hot too. ;)
ColdplaySucks 18
No
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Hmm, I know you guys are going to thumb me down for asking, but what's wrong with that comment? Not my funniest, but I didn't think it was that bad..
happle 21
Because Rudolph isn't hot. Blitzen on the other hand...
gc327072 31
He wants to mount her on the wall....
insertnameherr 11
oh please blitzes got nothin of dasher. he gets me going
happle 21
But Dasher is too fast. That's why he's Dasher...
Sputnikspak 13
Well, you asked for a 'wild' fantasy, you got one.
gc327072 31
"Tell me the truth!" "You CAN'T HANDLE the truth!"
Sputnikspak 13
In the words of Dan Savage: "Better to be with an honest foot fetishist than a dishonest necrophiliac."
SirCharles83 13
You and me, baby we ain't nothin but mammals so let's do it like they do it on the discovery channel.
green2go 14
I love how you have 69 likes
Oblivious_Mom 1
Hey one mans animal planet is another mans ****
bwzwally8 15
Ho Ho Ho
Eorlas 31
You're 2/2 on bad comments I've seen you post today.
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
At least you can be his sexy little vixen! You don't hoof to do it of course, but fur your husband you might want to get into the festive spirit and have a little fawn with him
gnattine 11
*applause*
klovemachine 24
*Standing ovation*
jpz229 5
That was FUNNY!
jpz229 5
That was one of the most intelligent posts I have ever seen on here.!
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
:') :D aww thanks! I could doe better, buck I can't think of any more puns, sorry my Fallow FMLers
99megster 15
You and me, baby, ain't nothin' but mammals! So lets do it like they do on the discovery channel ;)
EnterSandman_fml 20
I'm glad I'm not the only one that thought of this. I can't give you thumbs up enough times.
RadioDeeJayy_ 6
So, how did it feel like?
howdeedoo 22
Seeing that it was posted on this site, I would assume that OP didn't actually agree to do it
supportcommand 17
Or maybe she's still thinking and wants the valued opinions of the FML members. I say do it. He's your husband. Then you get to pick something.
Sinamoi 18
Well, I won't look at Bambi quite the same way again...