Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML
Today, I finally summoned the courage to ask my dad to pay me as he promised, after I cut the lawn and cleaned all the house windows last week. His response was, "Get fucked." FML
Today, I mowed our lawn without being asked. My sister wouldn't stop yelling at me for not checking with her, because she wanted the grass to get long enough to "play jungle" in. My mom sided with her. FML
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML
Today, I tried fixing my dad's lawnmower after he said, "Girls can't change a lightbulb right, let alone fix a machine." An hour later, when I had the lawnmower running again, he bitched me out for trying to make him "look stupid." He's been sulking and acting pissy ever since. FML
Today, I borrowed my dad's car to run a quick errand, which he never lets me do. I thought I’d got away with it until he got home and started yelling. I forgot, dad always reverses into driveways, while I prefer to drive straight in, and I'd parked his car facing the wrong way. FML
Today, my dad yelled at me for being irresponsible while he watched me fold his laundry. FML
Today, I found out my dad gets my younger brother a Big Gulp from 7/11 every time he mows the yard. I mowed for three years straight and never got anything. FML
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Top comments
lifeislife_fml 0
Do it in spirals next time!
tarheel22893 0
For being ungrateful, you should punish him by mowing a giant penis into the yard,,, or if you want to be really mean,, you could make that original penis, label it "average", and then mow in a comparably small one and label it "Dad/his actual name" (by labeling, I mean you mow the words average and dad/his actual name below the respective penises) and then take a picture of both from the roof of your house and send them to all his know acquaintances (from an anonymous email address) and then mow the areas around them to hide your handiword
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Comments (164)
Adie_fml 5
sorry to say but it sounds like he has some OCD going on. by i mean only wanting it to go one way and not another.
EveryDayJackAss 0
vertical and horizontal make me confused O_O
iamelrebel 0
parents suck. but just be proud of the fact that you did it, and if you do things just to get the praise of others, you are always going to be disappointed.
tipple 0
I can't decide without more information: Has your Dad told you countless times before which way you're supposed to mow the lawn? - in which case learn to pay attention! YDI. Is this the first time you've mown the lawns? - in which case your father is an anal retentive asshole. FYL. (Although, his being an ARA could explain why you have 2 acre lawns...)
Sturmeh 0
you're doing it wrong!
dennis96411 12
5 words: Your dad is an ass
Peacelover99 0
Your dad is an ass. Never do anything for him again.
elliekinslurvsya 0
that must have been annoying, but what annoys me most is that you said "our ENTIRE 2 ACRE LAWN". 2 acres really isn't much. of course, i haven't cut grass in 5 years because i live in arizona now and my lawn doesn't have any grass (it's only one acre anyway). but since the time i was capable of mowing a lawn until 5 years ago, i was mowing my SIX acre lawn all the time. and that grass grew pretty fast... anyway, just saying. a 2 acre lawn isn't much. oh, and toughen up. so your dad complained about how you cut the grass...now you know how to do it next time.
TiffJ16 0
2 things, first of all, I know this is gonna sound stupid & im sure ya'll are gonna talk shit because thats what you do when you are behind the safety of a computer, BUT, I would like to know if someone could tell me what OP stand for and what trolling means? Also, this sounds JUST like my dad. Poor thing.
Kamikun616 0
OP means original poster, and refers in this case to the person who submitted the FML, trolling refers to people making comments with the intent of stirring shit up and making people pissed off.
inmyroom 1
ey if ur worried about people trahing your posts, i have one suggestion for you: urban dictionary. just google it and you'll never have to ask about slang again.