Today, I texted this girl I really like and she didn't answer. She did about two hours later and it said, "Sorry, I was having sex at the time you texted me. So how are you?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, to get my mind off being single, I texted some friends. The first one was going out tonight to work things out with her ex, the second told me about his amazing new girlfriend, and the third replied an hour later with, "Sorry, I was having sex when you texted me." FML
Today, I was going down on a girl. When I looked up she was texting. FML
Today, I texted the hottest girl in the school saying, "I really like you, we should date". She responded with a text saying, "Sorry, I'm not into you." I then got a text saying, "Sorry, my brother stole my phone, and answered, but still it's no". I got rejected twice. Once by a man. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML
Today, the girl I really liked started talking to me, so I asked her out on a date. After waiting an hour at the theatre, I texted her asking where she was. She replied with, "Oh! You were serious about the date?!" FML
Today, I called my girlfriend and she answered telling me how amazing the sex was last night and she can't wait to see me later. I didn't see her last night. FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend, saying "Hey there." She quickly replied, assuring me that she's not cheating on me. Uh, okay. FML
Today, my girlfriend hasn't spoken to me in a week, so I gave her a call. No reply. I texted her, and got a text back saying: "Sorry, dude. Better luck next time!" FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she lost her phone and not to call or text her. After about three hours, I text her phone, asking if she found it yet. I got a reply, saying "Nope." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JustAGirl_fml 0
Kiiiiind of an over-share. Are you sure she wasn't being, I don't know, funny or something?
that_one_guy 0
Yea, I'm going with #1 for this one. I'm doubting it, I think she may have just been trying to screw with you.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (60)
xtatik 0
i call BS!!!!!!!! seriously who would msg that to someone??
lonelymatchmaker 0
Actually, I texted a friend of mine and a while later he called me saying, "Sorry I didn't text back. I was jerking off. How are you?" So it's not really all that unlikely..
kheemy 0
hey, fmylife.com says youre the first wyoming fml. you rock
Zoockey 5
pretty tough dude. I know it sounds rubbish, but there are more fish in the big big sea
magarkatherine 1
she was kidding
katelynandtanner 0
either she is just a bitch or a lier, either way you are better off
mandarinnilssn 10
How does that make her bitchy?..
apfunction 0
rough dude.
chew4220 0
damn brah thats some weak ass shit stay tough man
ryguy997 0
my name Is Ryan to!
greenday765 0
ah dam.. makes me feel bad for u yet horny at the same time..
wriptidez 0
who says thar