Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friend threw a milkshake at a guy spinning a sign on the side of the road. The guy stormed over and dragged my friend out the car window. When I jumped out to help, I'd forgotten to put my car in park, and it rolled across the street and hit a ditch. Then the sign spinner kicked both our asses. FML
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML
Today, I was at a friend’s birthday party. I slipped and fell onto the table of presents, knocking each one of them over, pulling a muscle in the process. My friend bitched me out for not being careful and “ruining” his presents. I got kicked out. FML
Today, I went to a party where I met some nice girls. One of them was really sweet and we were having a great time in my friend's backyard. As I was on the swing, I was gonna give her my number, but instead, I gave her a harsh kick to the face. FML
Today, I walked up to my friend and slapped her ass, because that’s what we always do. Turns out, it wasn’t my friend, it was a total stranger. FML
Today, I bumped into a guy I bullied for years at a bar. He was actually cool and laughed about it, but my stupid drunk ass kept urging him to hit me because I felt bad about it. We went outside and he thrashed me. At least we're friends now, I guess… FML
Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house to celebrate her birthday but 3 of them ganged up on me and molested my arse cheeks. Later, someone found a wooden plank and spanked me hard. There was also a BB gun and my arse was the target. I have been a social outcast all my life, and these are my only friends, but I'm always hit. FML
Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I face-planted. I was going to say "Fuck you" and "I will kill you." It came out as "I will fuck you." He's still laughing. FML
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Top comments
OysterPearls 33
You should feel like an asshole, are you in sixth grade? I didn't know then"kick me" gag was still existent.
_FML_Austin_ 12
Were you not expecting some one to kick him? F that random guys life, not yours...
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Comments (91)
fsomelife 26
In all fairness, nobody forced him to kick the dude. Dumb prank, dumb guy going along with it.
jackm0920 1
That's not an FML. that's awesome
grunt_fml 17
Wow, when three assholes meet...
kuromi0225 10
Although I do still think op is an A++ dick head for putting the sign on him and then not stopping him from hurting the guy. the person who actually kicked him is an idiot too... who the hell kicks someone they don't know. even if there is a sticker on him... he seems like a complete idiot to me as well. I'd honestly say **** your friends life since I'm almost sure he had penalties for that.
blackman303 11
Idk why everyone is taking this so serious, where I am from a sign like that everyone just laughs at it, I think you were unlucky that someone actually did it cause no one ever does, besides who kicks someone they don't know just because of a sign
arre2006 19
You deserve it
tashtkt 9
You are one.
jorgenator95 6
There's a special place in hell for u people!!!!!!!!! ??
toiletgod 15
No problem. Anybody who kicks someone deserves a good shit kicking, and anyone who beats the crap out someone for a kick in the bum deserves a swift kick in the ass. seems like everything worked out fine.
trendkilla254 4
**** that random guy. He knew what the damn deal was.