Today, I recieved a message on MySpace from a cute guy I've been talking to for a while. It read, "I saw a girl in Old Navy at the mall last night that looked a lot like you, but she was much fatter." I was in Old Navy at the mall last night. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the store and ran into an old friend that I hadn't seen in years. We chatted a little, and just as I was leaving he grabbed his mobile phone. Later, I added him on Facebook. Turns out the last thing he posted was a picture of my back saying: "Look who got even fatter." FML
Today, I noticed my crush of almost 3 years was talking to me a lot more at school. He seemed genuinely comfortable around me, even playing with my rings during class. I thought maybe I had a chance. Nope. A mutual friend just told me he likes another girl. A girl who coincidentally looks just like me but skinnier. FML
Today, I sent a guy that I like a lot a picture of myself. I'd got all dressed up sexy and did my make-up. He sent me a reply saying, "Your cat is fat." FML
Today, I saw my friend's ex and noticed she had gained a ton of weight since he dated her and had been dating someone else. It reminded me of my friend, so I messaged him and made a joke about her being unrecognizable. He informed me that they started seeing each other again last week. FML
Today, the "hot" guy I've been talking to for a few weeks sent me a picture. He was very overweight and not good looking at all. He then followed up with, "Now send me one of you so I can prove to all of my friends that you're real." FML
Today, I was messaged by a great guy I went to college with, and he was telling me how stupid he had been for not asking me out in college and about how much he had liked me. After talking for 30 minutes about trying to get together soon, he told me that he had mistaken me for someone else. FML
Today, I saw a girl I haven't seen in 4 years. She used to like me back then. Since then I have lost 50 pounds, and never had the confidence to ask her out. She said I looked really sexy so I decided to ask her out on a date then and there. She said no, she only likes fat guys. FML
Today, I was at the store when I ran into an old friend from high school. He didn't recognize me at first, but when I told him who I was, he instantly shouted "Oh! Yeah! The fat chick from Mr. H's class!" FML
Today, I went out to a restaurant to meet a girl that I met online. When I arrived, I texted her and she said she was wearing a blue shirt. The only person that was wearing anything blue was a fat man smiling in the corner. FML
Today, I was at the gym and saw an old friend. I have put on a lot of muscle in the past few months, and she said to me "Wow, you've really gotten big." Just by habit I said "You too." Turns out she's gained 45 lbs since I'd last seen her. Oops. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
That's the danger of Photoshopping your MySpace picture too much and celebrating your fraud by stuffing your face with chili cheese fries.
ISellHerbs 0
Maybe you should take that as a hint.
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Comments (123)
MiddleChild08 0
At least he doesn't think it was you, or isn't letting you know that he knows it was you. I think if he knew it was you though he wouldn't have told you, because then he would have to answer you as to why he did not talk to you. I agree with the others though, even if he didn't think it was you, he is still shallow and sounds like an ass. Better you know that now...
jensenr88 0
haha @
lets_be_ian 5
to me this is just more proof that Old Navy easily adds 25-50 pounds... and that is just being in the store... you can extrapolate from this what the horrible attire sold there actually does for your apperance. Or perhaps you should use a more recent photo on your myspace... one of the two, you choose.
alexandraa_fml 0
I cannot STAND old navy clothes!!!!! They are so frickin' ugly!
Ellowise_fml 0
Maybe MySpace makes you look slim?
allmidnighteyes 11
No, Photoshop does.
iwannafuckyaman 0
haha stop eating. Fatty
alexandraa_fml 0
Atleast the heifer knows not to ever meet up with him now hahahahaahaha oink
greenfairy_fml 0
I'm a horrible person for laughing at this. But I did. Did you only know him from myspace or does he actually know what you look like?
cerious22 0
thats because your the kind of bitch that takes the neck up pictures while hiding your walrus body....just putting that out there.
XaosZaleski 0
@23: Cows don't 'oink' you idiot.
alexandraa_fml 0
oink was unrelated to heifer smart@
laurr_rawrs 0
@30: wow you dumb *****. a heifer is a cow. cows don't oink, they moo. pigs oink.
alexandraa_fml 0
holy fkn sh!t, I KNOW. Can I not say oink and heifer in the same sentence? Im well aware of what a heifer is or i wouldnt have used the stinkin' word. Just because I felt like saying 'oink' at the end doesnt mean I was refering to heifers making the noise 'oink' ya fat tard!
xbrit551 13
Alexandraa... Just shut up
saimaali 0
The_Pleb REALLY needs a sandwich.