Today, I received a notice that my boyfriend had given me a rose via Happy Aquarium on Facebook. It came with a date cancellation so that he and his friends could play BioShock. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a rose from my boyfriend. The card read, "It's over." FML
Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML
Today, my boyfriend treated me to a surprise romantic dinner, got me a huge balloon bouquet, a dozen roses, and a beautiful card for my birthday. Too bad it's his ex's birthday and not mine. FML
Today, my boyfriend sent me a bouquet of roses with a message attached. The message said, "Ever since your dog died you've stopped putting out, so I think we should break up." FML
Today, my boyfriend ditched me, saying he had some important things to do. When I checked on him a while later, I found out what was so "important". A game called Robot Unicorn Attack. FML
Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML
Today, I received a bouquet of flowers from my boyfriend, which is something he's never done before. Unfortunately, this was his way of apologizing for cheating on me. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a poem saying "Roses are red, violets are blue, rubbish is dumped and so are you." FML
Today, I spent an ungodly amount of money to send my long-distance boyfriend a giant bouquet of roses for Valentine's Day. A few hours after making the non-refundable payment, he let me know we weren't going to work out, and that he was already sleeping with someone else. FML
Today, I got a bouquet of beautiful flowers from someone I'd never heard of. My boyfriend flipped his shit and stormed out, calling me a cheater. I called the flower shop. Turns out he made a fake order, just so he could accuse me of cheating and dump me. FML
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Top comments
CallMeHush 1
Well, Bio-Shock is pretty cool.
CyrusTheBlue 0
Bros before hoes. Sorry but that's the rule.
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Comments (207)
CallMeHush 1
Well, Bio-Shock is pretty cool.
ImRawrtastic 0
ur bf sounds lyk a fag no offence
dodgewama 0
bioshock 2 !! like they said u can't blame him , it's THE GAME :p
silentfog 0
If you played bioshock you'd understand
naturally_artifi 0
damn you #15! I LOST!!!
pongmaster 0
yeah I agree if OP ever played bio schok she would eat yarn and shit sweaters
MQ_was_here 0
Talking about blame...I remember playing that game as a kid and also how my younger brother started saying "fuckno head" (a word derived of "****" and some gibberish a 5-year-old can put together) and everytime he'd lose he'd yell out "Fuckno head!" and of course when asked who taught it to him, he blamed it on me. I'm not gonna say what happened next but dear OP, I feel for you. I effin hate that game. -_-
chipmunk95 0
@op for the fml and op of this post Its Bioshock now Bio-Shock and second Bioshock 2 IS THE ****** SHIT!
Aggriken 0
Today, I found out that my boyfriend's life does not revolve around me. He would rather play a game that he thinks is fun, than put up with me bitching at him about it. WTF. FML
lolcatsyo 0
meh I liked the first one, haven't played the second yet...
Comatose27 0
Even though Bioshock is awesome, I would never ditch a girl I care abouy for it.
jtlf1346 1
You need to get a life.
bennjerry44 0
I would so much rather go onna date than play video games
mandy_Reeves 0
lol yeah! Was it the new one? If so I woulda been like Can I come too? I
l1douchhe1l 0
they were playing BIOSHOCK 2 probably and its spelled all caps op
l1douchhe1l 0
u obviously have no one who cares about u though
OmgGuessWhatChic 0
Bros and bioshock before hoes
YeahFMLxX 0
obviously they were playing BioShock 2. Silly moose, oh and for everyone out there.. you die in all four alternative endings with Elanore taking whatever you decide to be, good or bad, depending on whether you save or harvest the little sisters, as her ego in BioShock 3. YEAH! EDIT; (in one ending she throws you back down to rapture: sorry.) Thus this could be a continuation of the problem that your bf wants to hit that ending (: yay!
hapylordofdeath9 0
BIOSHOCK IS THE BEST GAME IN EXISTANCE!!!
Otto12 0
it's not just bioshock, it's Bioshock 2! get your facts straight OP
Guuurlplease 0
I want to get bioshock! Go play bioshock with him :)
jess08265 0
I'm a girl and I love bioshock! tonight after eating dinner with my boyfriend we went up to his room and I played bioshock 2 for about 2 or 3 hours. it's addicting! assasins creed and left for dead are good too if you ask me! :)
thoughtcrimeno1 0
Op: get a life, would you kindly?
nrdsgtbck0121 0
The OP wasn't talking about Super Mario Bros. BIOSHOCK isn't old enough for you to "remember playing that as a kid". FAIL.
KishiSenmatsu 0
lol, well at least the game doesn't suck...
the_sodomizer 0
bioshock is not just cool. it is the shit.
falconmooch 0
boards.4chan.org/v/ Bioshok!!!!!!1!!!!1!1!!!
wolfmother_fml 0
bioshock is pretty awsome
twilight_lupus 13
i agree bioshock is the best. mah fried got me addicted. though it sucks that the date was canclled. but come on its BIOSHOCK!!!!!!!
hershey098 0
bioshock is the shit
portablecupid 3
if you were cool youd play it with him. i bought bioshock and its badass, plus its awesome to play with my boyfriend.
portablecupid 3
@135 haha me and my boyfriend play l4d too! were in a long distance relationship so we like to game together as a sort of date night, but since i have a 360 and he has a ps3 we have to play the pc version :/
acesarge 0
Eh, the PC version of L4D 2 is better anyway.
RyanZhang22 1
yeah, why you hatin?!? I hate haterz, so I hate you. bitch
tisiphone_fml 0
Yet another girl agrees, Bioshock is incredible. You should play it with them.
bigboy777 0
nvr put video games infront of loved ones I'm a videogameaddict and I dont do that btw bio shock isn't what all it cracked up to be it is actually pretty stupid!
bigboy777 0
#78 nos what it is!!!!!!!!!! u just don't do tht
xMinna 0
aha agreed. >:D
emo_fail_child 0
yeah it's a kick ass game
col535 0
Ever heard the saying "Bros before hos?"
babyseacow 2
Actually, BioShock 2 is less than a year old. and BioShock came out in 2005.. I think.
babyseacow 2
Sorry, that was for 165.
BadAsCactus 7
I love Bioshock I cant wait for Bioshock infinite
cocainewhore 30
#1 this was posted on valentines day though. Cancelling on her to play a game which can be played whenever was pretty mean.
CyrusTheBlue 0
Bros before hoes. Sorry but that's the rule.
blubawlsguar 0
tool
CyrusTheBlue 0
U Mad?
Elizabeth_lyi 0
Chicks before dicks
peacebaby2413 0
agreed!
lolcatsyo 0
lol while we're rhyming "be a skter not a jock, grab ur board not ur ****!"
The__Redneck 7
Pussy takes Precedence.
BritishHobo 0
Hmm. Does the sort of person that says things like 'bros before hoes' or 'pussy takes precedence' actually get any, or have any 'bros'?
st0815 9
Probably tards like to hang out together, and plenty of girls have a total lack of self respect.
Unlucky_Gun 0
Okay go ahead and keep following that 'rule' but don't come crying to us when you can't get any toolbag
Unlucky_Gun 0
#147: no, a douche like #2 who follows that 'bros before hoes' rule doesn't get any
TheLynx_fml 20
You are a wonderful human being
burnforeternity 30
But it's not bros before girlfriends
orbiter6467 0
atleast you got a rose? :P
Freeze_fml 17
A virtual rose.
kaileebug 0
I think it's BioShock 2. But still.. great game!
deadsrs 0
The best kind. It says "I love you... but I would rather tell you that from a distance and while spending a little money and effort as is humanly possible". damnit... am I confusing best with worst again?
supercu96 0
look at the bright ide, you dont have to tend to it :)
MermaidSongXOXO 6
The solution: No sex for a year :]
MermaidSongXOXO 6
Then maybe she should break up with him if he'd cheat on her just 'cuz she wouldn't put out.
Soare 0
For a year? Perfect.
BigLostBear 0
you are both so cruel, don't you understand that he's playing bioshock?
JohnyF 0
There another sollution though, he can f*** her while playing BioShock at the same time. Possible
daniel1_1 13
Bio ****
BloodyMontage 0
WIN!
sarcdude 3
or perhaps he should break up with her for not putting out simply out of being a vengeful person.
Thatk1ddd 0
Maybe you're just not that good looking.
purplemnm 9
just remember...bros before hoes...sisters before misters ;D
ily1210 10
chicks before dicks :)
thor89 0
agree if that's really you 13 damn you're hot
YeahFMLxX 0
ugh: seconds #25..unlless your like 13 D:
devendra_fml 0
oh, i love bioshock!
00pedro00 0
#11 fails for not knowing what BioShock is
sks4613 1
WTF? bioshock 1 was the sh@t bioshock is just as good. I was up playing it last night till 4 in the morning didn't hear my wife b@tching about it. I can tell you how it ends if you wanna **** it up for him?
AbOvE_88 0
Bioshock 2 FTW! :D
Unlucky_Gun 0
#12: no life
deadsrs 0
You should be happy. You're boyfriend obviously has good taste in video games. hurhurhur
drumsetmaniac77 0
@ british hobo. I bet you are gay because almost every normal guy plays video games. Not for days or anything. But sometimes you just need something a little bit different once and awhile. Maby you should try being a man for once in life.
Freeze_fml 17
I don't understand why someone in Britain would be searching for a woman in Michigan, United States.
CyrusTheBlue 0
Listen to this man (drumsetmaniac77). He knows what he's talking about.
Vayt 2
Clearly, this man has never played BioShock. Also: your point (that men who choose games over girls are creeps) is a bit undercut by the fact that you're trying to pick someone up on a website like this.
BritishHobo 0
Three points. Or two, I'm not sure yet. 1. I'm gay because I'd rather be with a girl than playing a game? That's some genius ******* logic there, Holmes. 2. I'm not trying to pick up any girl who happens to live in Michigan. I'm looking for a specific person. I know posting for help on here's going to get me nowhere, but I felt like posting it anyway, just because. Hell, why not :P 3. I didn't call anyone a creep. I called them fucktards. I don't mean anyone that plays games, I love gaming. But people that would purposely avoid their girlfriend to play gaming. Then again, I haven't played Bioshock xD
acesarge 0
What are you a Boomer?
BritishHobo 0
Who knows?
MadaZer0 8
Gonna agree with the British guy... plus... BioShock is shit compared to MW2... Wait... *goes and plays Bio Shock 2* .... Did I say MW2 was better than BS2...? O.O Think I was high when I said that...
lolcatsyo 0
dude modern warfare 2 ******* sucked...
Lim23 0
Not trying to be a berd, but: Headshot?
sublime93 0
71...just cause you suck at mw2 doesn't make it a bad game. it's awesome
MadaZer0 8
I agree with subline... I can kick your ass in it and my kill/death ratio is a 0.69!!! Oh shit... did I write that o.o...
sertyla 1
71: Seems like that's the only excuse cod lovers can say.
BBoureaux 8
Excuse me, 23, but are you saying gay people aren't normal? As a matter of fact, are you saying gay people don't play video games? What the hell ARE you saying, seriously?
corleon198425 22
bioshock is the shit stop being a winey ****