kiki
United States
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anon
United States
Today, I discovered that my name literally means "burden". This wouldn't be so bad if both my mother and father knew this when they named me. FML
why
United States
Today, I learned that my parents' nickname for my fiancé is "dickwad." FML
noway
Cholet, France
Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML
Kilamo
Paris, France
Where did you learn that one?
Today, I tried to impress a French student by saying “Bonjour!” but instead said “Bordel!” which means “Brothel.” She laughed, and so did every one of the french students around us. My cultural street cred is officially dead. FML
lawoman27
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad was having an affair on my mom with. FML
Dog_Lover
Montreal, Canada
Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my girlfriend named my penis "little baby carrot." FML
Anonymous
C'est la langue de l'amour!
Today, my French teacher set up a role-play scenario to act out in front of the class. During one of my lines, I mispronounced a phrase and called my teacher sexy. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML
Jololol
United States
Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
Top comments
BoyFromTheFuture 0
nice... now you need to find someone with a name that's slang for ****** and you have a solemate.
danza_fml 0
Actually, it could also be "Zizi", but I'm assuming it's Kiki because that seems more plausible. FYL OP, but I guess it's a nice way to break the ice, no? "Hi, what's your name?" "Penis. What's yours?" :)
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Comments (326)
dyldo 0
dick is not a french name it's short 4 richard
serbodude 0
vous le vous coucher avec moi?
insanojaster 0
French word for penis is pénis... so I dont know how long it took you to figure that one out lol If true, YLIF
1luckeguy 0
Have you ever heard the song "A Boy Named Sue?". Maybe your dad wanted you to grow up tough.
lolipop3344 0
hi my name is penis il be your server today!
torirules 0
sorry ur dad sounds like a dick... hah like ur name
apintsizepeanut_fml 4
there's a site on google called 205 ways to say penis in French… that's a lot of options for a name. I'm guessing Zizi is your name haha.
Intoxicunt 6
It was KIKI, hence the FML being submitted by.... you guessed it! KIKI! Is it so much to ask that people even skim through the comments before saying the same thing over and over? -_-
perdix 31
We should get together and hang out sometimes. My parents named me Peter Dick JohnThomas Johnson (and neither of them was a Johnson.) Hang out . . . get it? Hahaha!
yourkiddingright_fml 0
Bullshit!
solecism 0
ce soir