Today, I realized I can never live with my fiancée. A childhood of systematic teasing, abuse, and humiliation has made me terrified to use a bathroom around a guy if there's the slightest chance I can be heard, seen, or even have anyone know what I'm up to. Therapy has yet to fix anything. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally told my boyfriend that I see a therapist every week because, amongst other things, I'm terrified of being locked in a room. He didn't believe me, so he locked me in the bathroom "for a laugh." I had a panic attack and passed out. FML
Today, I still have my ridiculous fear of being heard on the toilet, and I can't go if people are around. I'd just sat down on the toilet when three of my housemates started chatting immediately outside the door. I had to sit silently until they were gone. For half an hour. FML
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
Today, despite my fear of using public restrooms, I was forced to anyway to avoid my bladder exploding. I was finally getting over it when someone stuck their head under the stall to "see if someone's in there". I'm scared more now than I was before. FML
Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me because I still close the door when I go to the bathroom. He pees and poops with the door wide open and expects me to do the same. FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML
Today, I found out that both my boyfriend and his brother feel completely comfortable going into the bathroom and talking to their mother while she is on the toilet. FML
Today, and for the last week, I've resorted to driving myself to the nearest corner store to take my daily dump. I'm doing this because I recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I'm afraid he'll be disgusted at how often I clog the toilet. FML
Today, I was speaking with my therapist about future romantic endeavors. I'm currently separating from my husband of three years. I feel it's unlikely I will ever date again, and I've developed a phobia of sex over the past year. It's so severe that I cannot even masturbate. Destined to die alone. FML
Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML
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Top comments
cursesonyourmom 1
buy a little radio and play it in the bathroom. even if your just putting on makeup. that way he can't hear you and doesn't know what your doing.
lolorly 0
"If you have to shit, shit! If you have to fart, fart! You will feel much better for it." ~Mao Tse-tung
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Comments (235)
rachexl 0
what is this a convention of people with weird bathroom fears? ive never heard of anyone being scared of taking a shit yet every other post on here is me too omgomgomg i thought i was the only one!!!!!!!
PsychoMerk 0
drop a steaming pile! :D*
JojoPotatoe 0
I think I know how you feel. ^^ *fills up with sympahty*
mzhonesty 0
What EXACTLY happened to you during your childhood?
skyeyez9 25
Am I the only one on here who thinks taking a huge, satisfying dump in the morning while reading FML on my iPhone is the best way to start the day?
mshafty 0
Nope! it's a great way to start the day. Though i'm on my droid!
rb2_addict 0
LOL agreed and well said. guess where I am now...
taintedtruffle 42
:) i prefer to poop at work that way I'm getting paid to shit~
jahicken 0
this belongs on postsecret, not fml.
cytoloopy 1
#74 why is this so weird. I've been through it and continue to...
kelleyb323 0
I used to have that problem and after 2 years of going to the bathroom at walmart, I can now use the bathroom in my boyfriends apartment as long as he is distracted or sleeping and the sink and vent are on. :)
0p3nl0v3 0
YDI FOR BEING A CHILHOOD PANSY. go live ur life with 50 cats fat cat lady biatch
Blatstuff 0
125, You're a dimwit. I hope while spending time incarcerated (as it's obviously the path you are on) Bubba and Jim-Bob take pleasure in giving you some deep-seeded fears and anxieties. Moreover, I hope you are treated with the callousness you have displayed here. Low life.
qazwerty 5
How on earth did you get through college? Hold it all in until the breaks and poo when you're home?