Today, I realized I can never live with my fiancée. A childhood of systematic teasing, abuse, and humiliation has made me terrified to use a bathroom around a guy if there's the slightest chance I can be heard, seen, or even have anyone know what I'm up to. Therapy has yet to fix anything. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally told my boyfriend that I see a therapist every week because, amongst other things, I'm terrified of being locked in a room. He didn't believe me, so he locked me in the bathroom "for a laugh." I had a panic attack and passed out. FML
Today, I still have my ridiculous fear of being heard on the toilet, and I can't go if people are around. I'd just sat down on the toilet when three of my housemates started chatting immediately outside the door. I had to sit silently until they were gone. For half an hour. FML
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
Today, despite my fear of using public restrooms, I was forced to anyway to avoid my bladder exploding. I was finally getting over it when someone stuck their head under the stall to "see if someone's in there". I'm scared more now than I was before. FML
Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me because I still close the door when I go to the bathroom. He pees and poops with the door wide open and expects me to do the same. FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML
Today, I found out that both my boyfriend and his brother feel completely comfortable going into the bathroom and talking to their mother while she is on the toilet. FML
Today, and for the last week, I've resorted to driving myself to the nearest corner store to take my daily dump. I'm doing this because I recently moved in with my boyfriend, and I'm afraid he'll be disgusted at how often I clog the toilet. FML
Today, I was speaking with my therapist about future romantic endeavors. I'm currently separating from my husband of three years. I feel it's unlikely I will ever date again, and I've developed a phobia of sex over the past year. It's so severe that I cannot even masturbate. Destined to die alone. FML
Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML
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Top comments
cursesonyourmom 1
buy a little radio and play it in the bathroom. even if your just putting on makeup. that way he can't hear you and doesn't know what your doing.
lolorly 0
"If you have to shit, shit! If you have to fart, fart! You will feel much better for it." ~Mao Tse-tung
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Comments (235)
texas_justice 0
here's some tough love for you... this poo thing is just the tip of the iceberg. don't ask someone else to love you when you cannot love yourself. do your fiancé a favor and leave him. when you are a whole person, then you can share your life.
heyheyt 0
ahh I couldn't have said it better
oOohxlala_ 0
you need to tell your fiancee-- OPEN UP!
bigpapi210 0
that sucks.
SarahN_fml 0
OP, eventually your fiancee is going to realize that you never go to the bathroom and probably get really worried about it and your health. Try to explain the situation to him (if he makes fun of you or tells you to suck it up or whatever, tell him to **** off). Then you can possibly come up with a schedule or some ideas together to help you. If you are going to marry this man, you won't be able to hide this from him forever. To everyone here essentially telling the OP to "grow up" or just "get over it": You're all idiots. Extreme anxiety is a MEDICAL problem. It would be just like telling someone with a compound leg fracture to "quit being a pussy and walk it off." Or hiding someone's inhaler or epipen when they need it because they should just be able to "deal." Your ignorance is astounding.
HIJKay 0
Thank you, it is so refreshing to read a comment that actually makes sense.
lostfaithinpppl 19
I agree! At least somebody here has some sense.
noobgang7 5
awhh I'm so sorry, I have anxiety which is fairly similar. I haven't used a public bathroom in years. it just takes some time to getting used to. I had a very hard time in grade 9 since it was out of my "comfort zone". I hope you find a way to deal with this :)
Flounder 2
I'm a nervous pooper too OP, so I feel your pain (even though Basic Training did help fix a large part of that problem). What helps for me is putting in ear plugs or listening to music loudly while going to the bathroom, it makes it easier to pretend that no one else can hear you if you can't hear yourself
rakethewidower 0
Sounds like Elliot from Scrubs.
oswald_fml 0
Indeed.
oopsitouchedmyse 0
talk to him about it. I bet he will be willing to try to help
missgreenday 0
Finally a real FML. By the way, you should get the book 'everyone poops'.
perdix 31
Two Girls, One Cup That'll fix it!