Today, I realized how much of a nutter my mother really is as she decided to write on a high visibility vest a "warning" that all foreigners, especially refugees, want to rape German women. She now wants to wear it each and every day in our hometown. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 65-year-old mother that it is inappropriate for her to walk around in front of me in her underwear. Her response? "Too bad." FML
Today, my mom decided to show me her new rape whistle. She kept blowing it every couple of minutes while we were stuck in traffic. FML
Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML
Today, it's 2026, and my mom is still shit-scared of COVID and demands I wear a mask, slather on hand sanitizer, and just generally make an ass of myself everywhere I go. Being with her in public is so humiliating, she wears a face shield, two masks, and is equal parts Karen and Hitler. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML
Today, my mother-in-law in all seriousness told my daughter to not wear shorts and skirts because “men will ogle and rape her.” When I confronted her about it, she told me, “I’m only looking out for her. Is that so wrong?” She’s 9 and she won’t stop asking what “rape” means. FML
Today, my mother is mad at me because I dared, yes DARED, to go out with a girl who stands up to her instead of just meekly doing what she tells her. Which should tell you exactly what sort of woman my mother is, so you know this FML is just the tip of my lifelong misery iceberg. FML
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Top comments
slumd0g 15
You should wear a similar vest warning people of your mother
RodzillaX 30
I see six.
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Comments (23)
HeartYou101 31
I can kind of understand where's she's coming from because of what happened in Cologne 3 weeks ago; but it's not fair tarnishing all "foreigners" with the same brush...
pokemyeyes 23
I cant understand where shes coming from at all, logically. The US and UK have the highest rape and sexual assault rates in the world yet you dont see British or American women wearing vests warning against British or American men? They even start relationships with them and are friends etc.
amileah13 26
She's the type of person you definitely don't want to hang around when she wears that.
sinverguenza 11
Ethnic Germans and the native populations of other European countries face an existential threat from waves of "refugees/migrants/asylum seekers", which mostly consist of young, fighting-age men in their prime. These "refugees" bring with them a culture and religion that are incompatible with Western values, particularly in regards to the treatment of women. That fact, coupled with the already low birth rates of native populations, will inevitably lead to social unrest caused by friction between foreign invaders and increasingly nationalistic natives that rightly sense that they and their way of life are in very real danger of being supplanted. But hey, at least you can smugly signal to everyone here how "lol crazy, right guys?" your mom is and what a tolerant soul you are.
Seceret_Chick 13
Your comment perfectly describes it.
Seceret_Chick 13
In reality half the refugees are doing that, and Europe is going to shit because of it.
cbchawks 14
I mean she was pretty much right if you reflect on it