Today, I realized how much of a nutter my mother really is as she decided to write on a high visibility vest a "warning" that all foreigners, especially refugees, want to rape German women. She now wants to wear it each and every day in our hometown. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 65-year-old mother that it is inappropriate for her to walk around in front of me in her underwear. Her response? "Too bad." FML
Today, my mom decided to show me her new rape whistle. She kept blowing it every couple of minutes while we were stuck in traffic. FML
Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML
Today, it's 2026, and my mom is still shit-scared of COVID and demands I wear a mask, slather on hand sanitizer, and just generally make an ass of myself everywhere I go. Being with her in public is so humiliating, she wears a face shield, two masks, and is equal parts Karen and Hitler. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
Today, my mom took a bright red sharpie and drew a red circle just above my breasts. She said, "If I can see this, ever, your shirt is either too low cut or too see through and it will be thrown away." FML
Today, my mother-in-law in all seriousness told my daughter to not wear shorts and skirts because “men will ogle and rape her.” When I confronted her about it, she told me, “I’m only looking out for her. Is that so wrong?” She’s 9 and she won’t stop asking what “rape” means. FML
Today, my mother is mad at me because I dared, yes DARED, to go out with a girl who stands up to her instead of just meekly doing what she tells her. Which should tell you exactly what sort of woman my mother is, so you know this FML is just the tip of my lifelong misery iceberg. FML
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Top comments
slumd0g 15
You should wear a similar vest warning people of your mother
RodzillaX 30
I see six.
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Comments (23)
greekk 21
sounds like a nice lady! haha seek help maybe, or wear a vest warning them of your mother!
trollcrusher 17
That second vest sounds like a good idea to me. I think I'm more sickened by the mother than she is by foreigners.
kimeatszombies 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I have no words for this..
RodzillaX 30
I see six.
slumd0g 15
You should wear a similar vest warning people of your mother
fumanshu 9
Hahhaa I was thinking the same thing!! ?
trollcrusher 17
Why the question mark? Are you uncertain of whether you really agree, and you're just asking other people what you're thinking? ;)
Ramb0 20
just talk some sense into her....its the only thing you can do. they are not all monsters.
Seabass_Chan 33
Get her help. Immediately. Believing that an entire group of people are capable of and willing to commit horrific acts over what a handful of rotten individuals have done is definitely paranoid thinking. Sadly she's not the only one who feels this way. I'm sure your country can understand that better than anyone. Try explaining it to your mother.
askullnamedbilly 33
Unfortunately, OP's mother is an adult and capable of making her own (terrible) decisions. OP can ask her mother to get help, but they can't force her - and she's probably not going to.
gopi_fml 23
talk to her and let her know that nobody wants to leave their life. if someone is a refuse, that means he doesn't have any other options. being an bit*h doesn't make her a concern citizen.
_ely_foster_ 11
id be so embarrassed, fyl indeed lol
Kieranr10 23
Is she equipped with a rape alarm?
Malsain_fml 10
What's the point in doing that? Does everybody will get conscious just from reading her vest?
Norvi 26
I'm sure she's just afraid because there have been multiple incidents where male refugees have groped and assaulted German women. Getting a t-shirt might be a bit extreme.