Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
Today, I checked my Facebook notifications to see that someone likes my new single status. My ex. FML
Today, I complained about being bored to death on Facebook. Someone took it as a suicide threat and called the police. They showed up at my apartment and my workplace. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, I had a horrible breakup with my girlfriend of two years. Depressed, I changed my Facebook status to, "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you." My ex commented, "Give me an orgasm?" Five of my friends, including my mom, liked this. FML
Today, I've been getting terrifying threats all day. Why? I broke up with my girlfriend and turned her in to the police after she and her friends shared their plan to firebomb a church during Sunday school. I didn't know I was dating a terrorist. I might need a new identity. FML
Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML
Today, I posted on Facebook that I got the Princess Peach Happy Meal toy and I was super ecstatic. A friend of mine commented, “This shit is why you’re 32 and still single as fuck. Get a boyfriend and go start a family.” Her comment got 38 likes. I threw my laptop across the room and burst into tears. FML
Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML
Today, my wife changed her Facebook status from "Married" to "Widowed". I'm scared. FML
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Top comments
legitkitty 11
Well, what did you expect? Batman is awesome!
dressedskeleton 10
Everyone's entitled to their own opinions- just not that opinion!
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Comments (411)
sovietkamikaze 4
To be fair, the new one did kinda suck.
dihannasaurus 9
you just have the wrong friends. i agree with you.
DickButt1 10
These people need to learn how to take a goddamn opinion. It's a shame that people are so close minded, OP.
THswagPLAYA 1
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
fake
tanman230 10
if you're talking about the one with bane I agree that was utterly horrible